Yea....thats it ;-) --- In [email protected], "feste37" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > > In fairness, there is an entire industry in this country that > diagnoses mental > illness and hands out pills to treat it as if they were Snickers > bars, which may > make the incidence of mental illness seem higher than elsewhere. > There are > wide country-to-country deviations in how such things are reported > and > classified. > > --- In [email protected], Sal Sunshine <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> > wrote: > > 3/22/05 > > > > AMERICA RULES! > > > > > > > > By David Podvin > > > > The World Health Organization has released a study that verifies > the > > United States is the undisputed champion in mental illness*, > dominating > > various pathologies ranging from anxiety to depression to poor > impulse > > control. We easily vanquished underachieving Old Europe in > > post-traumatic stress syndrome, bipolar disorder, and bulimia > nervosa. > > Additionally, our magnificent land trounced the supposedly > productive > > Asian countries in both senility and agoraphobia, while coasting > past > > Africa in pediatric hyperactivity. In fact, there would have been a > > gold medal sweep for America if Ukraine had not cheated by > submitting > > doctored urine to edge us out in substance abuse. > > > > In retaliation for Ukrainian treachery, "Chicken Kiev" will > henceforth > > be known by every patriotic American as "Chicken Freedom". > > > > Distributing praise for America's smashing victory requires > giving the > > devil his due. Although liberals abhor complimenting the right > wing, it > > is undeniable that without conservatives the United States would > not > > even be one of the hundred craziest countries. This is especially > true > > as it relates to the glamour categories of paranoia and psychosis. > > > > Any nation that aspires to lead the world in mental illness > requires a > > leader who is unabashedly mentally ill, and in this area America is > > truly blessed. Rather than educating himself on major issues of > life > > and death by studying, George W. Bush faithfully listens to the > voices > > in his head that have been keenly honed during a lifetime of not > > studying. Bush takes this approach based on his deeply held belief > that > > only by remaining abjectly ignorant of all relevant facts can he > > possibly make a fully informed decision. His commitment to > prioritizing > > fantasy over reality is strong and unyielding. The former Texas > > governor is a one-man psycho ward, and absent his sterling > contribution > > the United States could never have achieved derangement preeminence. > > > > When entering international mental illness competitions, having the > > Religious Right on your team is like being able to send Babe Ruth > up to > > the plate. The W.H.O. awarded America numerous insanity bonus > points > > for the insistence by our Holy Rollers that the bible must be > > interpreted literally. The English word "gay" doesn't > mean what it > > meant just a few decades ago, yet American zealots insist that the > > meaning of words translated from six thousand year old Hebrew can > be > > defined with precision and should be used to justify persecuting > human > > beings. The continued death struggle by our fundamentalists to > stave > > off the diabolical homosexual agenda of Tinky Winky and SpongeBob > > SquarePants guarantees that America's glorious reign as numero > uno loco > > will not end anytime soon. > > > > Projection is a component of mental illness that consists of > > attributing one's own deficiencies to others. Rush Limbaugh > deserves > > acclaim for enabling America to ace this category by making the > > observation that women who become liberals choose their philosophy > to > > compensate for being sexually undesirable. The scoring committee > noted > > that this ultimate case of projection came from a guy around whom > the > > Pacific Ocean could not get wet. > > > > The list of conservatives who deserve to be acknowledged for their > > contributions to our winning effort is a lengthy one indeed. There > is > > Asian American right wingette Michelle Malkin, who has written > > longingly of the good old days during World War II when citizens > with > > yellow skin enjoyed free room and board at all the finest > internment > > centers. There are the forty-five percent of Oklahomans who voted > to > > keep cockfighting legal, although fairness dictates inclusion of > the > > footnote that most of them did not know cockfighting involves > poultry. > > And then there are those Californians who approve of Arnold > > Schwarzennegger's pathetic job performance, apparently because > since he > > took office no one in the state has been killed by a cyborg > assassin. > > > > Of course, none of this proves that all conservative are bonkers. > Many > > Republicans are just as sane as the next guy, assuming the next guy > > happens to be Hannibal Lector. Even so, it is important to avoid > > stereotyping: as David Steinberg has observed, some blacks have no > > rhythm, some Jews can't handle money, and some Chinese people > don't all > > look alike. Just because right wingers believe the greeting > "Happy > > Holidays" constitutes a threat to their personal liberty does > not > > necessarily mean that every single one of them is cracked. > > > > There might be a rational conservative somewhere. The vaunted > liberal > > sense of fairness dictates that we allow for the possibility, > however > > theoretical it may be. > > > > It is helpful to understand why right wingers collectively lack any > > semblance of mental health. Clinicians have isolated the causality, > one > > that is fraught with irony: impaired blood flow to the brain > resulting > > from inhaling smog emitted by trees. Science has yet to determine > why > > psychotropic toxins produced by foliage target anti-environment > > Republicans rather than higher primates, but it may be some sort of > > cosmic quid pro quo. > > > > The great thing about starboard brainsickness is its constancy. > From > > the inception of the United States when right wingers passionately > > insisted that women were lesser humans and blacks merely farm > animals, > > our domestic goose steppers have been dependably daft. Through the > > centuries, conservatives have opposed all social advancement, and > have > > done so in the name of a supreme being whom they otherwise > disregard. > > Whether the issue has involved instituting public education or > > fluoridating the drinking water, the maniacs of the right have > screamed > > that the Apocalypse was being expedited. As is invariably true with > > people whose porch lights flicker dimly, the more conservatives are > > proven wrong, the more adamant they become. > > > > But while Republicans are the grandmasters of dementia, they do not > > possess a monopoly. Eight percent of self-identified liberals in > > America voted for Bush, which is like eight percent of > self-identified > > pedestrians in Japan voting for Godzilla. The reason generally > given > > involves approval of the Bush war on terrorism. Left unanswered is > > whether the most praiseworthy dimension of his anti-terror approach > was > > allowing our nation to be attacked or subsequently letting the > > attackers get away so that we could concentrate on killing people > who > > had nothing to do with it. > > > > In either case, approximately one out of every twelve liberals > has > > partaken of the Kool Aid and now swears that Bush is The > Magnificent > > Zorro, a swashbuckling defender of all peasants who bravely smites > > evildoers hither and yon. It is troubling when a few of the good > guys > > don aluminum headwear while lip-synching to Fox News, but it just > goes > > to show that this wonderful country's commitment to mental > illness runs > > wide and deep. > > > > The World Health Organization must be congratulated for finally > > declaring what those of us who are flag wavers have long contended > � > > that in addition to being the planet's only military > superpower, the > > United States sets the pace in the field of furthering madness. > Without > > meaning to gloat, when it comes to being non compos mentis, > we're > > number one with a bullet (and sixty-seven thousand nuclear > warheads). > > > > America is going to remain the alpha crazy dog for quite some > time, so > > all of you lousy little sane nations had better get used to it. > > Hopefully, you will not become offended when we get in your faces > to > > rave like lunatics about our W.H.O.-documented supremacy, and you > won't > > be offended as long as you remember just one thing: > > > > It's not bragging if it's true. > > > > � > > > > *The WHO World Mental Health Survey Consortium, "Prevalence, > Severity, > > and Unmet Need for Treatment of Mental Disorders in the World > Health > > Organization World Mental Health Surveys," Journal of the American > > Medical Association.�2004;291:2581-2590. > > > > Table 2. Twelve-Month Prevalence of World Mental Health Composite > > International Diagnostic Interview/Diagnostic and Statistical > Manual of > > Mental Disorders, Fourth Edition > > > > See also: "Global study finds mental illness widespread," The > > Associated Press, July 7, 2004 > > > > http://makethemaccountable.com/podvin/more/050322_AmericaRules.htm To subscribe, send a message to: [EMAIL PROTECTED] Or go to: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/FairfieldLife/ and click 'Join This Group!' Yahoo! Groups Links <*> To visit your group on the web, go to: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/FairfieldLife/ <*> To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to: [EMAIL PROTECTED] <*> Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to: http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/
