--- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, new.morning <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > > --- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, Vaj <vajranatha@> wrote: > > > > My partner has always interestingly 'pined: 'Men who search > > after younger women are looking for a mate their own emotional > > age.' In other words "you're attracted to someone your own > > emotional age (as opposed to your biological age)." > > If I understand your point, that is such a strange mind set -- the > premise that age correlates with emotional maturity --
I thought he was saying that age does *not* correlate with emotional maturity--that an older man who pursues younger women is emotionally immature. > more > specifically that a woman 10 years younger is more emotionally > mature than one 10 years older. Boy, I don't know how you came up with this-- it doesn't even fit with what you said to start with. That model does not fit my experience -- > certainly doesn't work well with many men -- just look at > this list. > > > And therefore un-equal age > > relationships (> ~10 years?) are a kind of parody of emotionally > > healthy humans. > > Again what a premise. A mind set that seems consistent with age > ghettos -- people of more than 10 years different ages should not > interact or congregate. What a sad vision and living of life. I don't think there's any "shoulds" in what Vaj said. But I also seriously doubt that a formula like that would apply across the board. A woman might well be mature beyond her years, for one thing; and for another, emotional-age differences tend to decrease as folks get older. A 50-year-old and a 60-year-old are likely to be much closer in emotional age than a 30-year-old and a 20-year-old, even though the chronological age difference is the same. In any case, I suspect that the biological imperative is much more significant than emotional immaturity in men, generally speaking, as the explanation for why men have traditionally sought mates younger than themselves. The younger the woman, the more children she can bear the man before her menopause; and presumably the man will remain capable of siring offspring more or less indefinitely, until he's so decrepit he can no longer function sexually. Plus which, up to a point, the older the man, the better able he'll be to support and protect the woman and her children while she's busy churning them out and raising them. In other words, that men are attracted to younger women is an evolutionary survival trait. Hmmm, if we put Vaj's theory and the biological imperative together, maybe emotional immaturity in men is also an evolutionary survival trait...
