Just for fun...

--- In [email protected], "authfriend" <jst...@...> wrote:
>
> I don't know why it hasn't occurred to me
> before, but I'd genuinely like to hear from Barry
> as to how he viewed the purportedly religious
> nature of TM when he was with the TMO. He's made
> it clear how allergic he is to any kind of
> religious thinking these days, and as his comments
> to Vaj indicate, he's completely convinced TM is
> a religion.
> 
> So was he inclined to religious belief when he
> was a TM teacher but has since lost that
> inclination? Or did he feel about religion then
> the way he feels now, and simply found a way not
> to let the religious component bother him? Or was
> he not even *aware* of the religious component at
> the time?

I will answer as honestly as I can, as if
Judy really deserved an answer. And I think
you all know that I don't believe she does,
so this should be viewed as an exercise in
compassion for me.  :-)

It's actually a little hard for me to think
back to those days. It's 3-4 decades in the 
past now, after all. *At the time*, I almost
certainly never thought of what I was doing
or what I was involved with as a religion.
I think I can say that with complete honesty.

WHY? Well, partly it was because of the TM 
Is Not A Religion Religion thing. We were 
*told* so often and so forcefully that TM 
was not a religion that I just bought it.
Partly it was because I had no *interest* in
religion per se, so I wasn't looking for it
or a substitute for it in TM, or in the TMO.
What I was looking for was a method of self
discovery, which I did not and still DO not
associate with religion.

And most importantly, it was probably because
as a TM Teacher I had been taught that the
"highest goal" was to parrot what I had been
told EXACTLY, without deviation. And I had
been told over and over and over not only that
"TM is not a religion," I had been told what
to say to people who were worried that it WAS
a religion. So I did exactly that.

I never "got off" on the puja or on "devotion"
to Maharishi or Guru Dev. For me, that was 
just mood-making muck I had to wade through to 
be part of something that *at the time* I 
believed in enough to teach, full-time. 

But yes, towards the end of my involvement 
with the TM movement, I *had* begun to "think
past" these enormous Bullshit Baffles, and had
started to have qualms about the stuff I was
saying. I remember having been asked by Jerry
Jarvis to go to a Christian church in Pacific
Palisades to attend an anti-TM rally there. 
(This was during the TM court case days.) At
that meeting I actually stood up and spouted
the lines I had been told to spout. And because 
I was a pretty good speaker at that time, I 
probably convinced a few people in the audience. 
But driving home, I realized that *I* was no 
longer convinced myself. 

I was just spouting stuff I'd been told to
spout. I was being a parrot, without ever 
thinking seriously about the parrot-talk. This
was shortly before my last TM course (Siddhis),
and I finally did some thinking there, and began
to realize how MUCH of the stuff I'd been spout-
ing was bullshit, and that that made me a bull-
shitter, not a teacher of self discovery. Shortly
after returning from that course I bailed out of
the TM movement.

I have NEVER been drawn to religion. Still am not.
What I was drawn to in TM was the same thing I 
was drawn to in psychedelics -- an inner journey,
an opportunity to *explore* the mind and its 
mysteries, and to experience different states of
consciousness. I did not and still DO not equate
that with religion. In fact, I find that the vast
majority of religions -- modern and ancient -- 
strove to *prevent* that kind of inner exploration
rather than facilitate it. 

That is, most religions are "anti-mystic." Almost
all of them were FOUNDED by mystics, but within a
few years or decades of the original mystic's 
death, dogma creeps into place that says that it
was OK for the founder to be a mystic and have 
these mystical experiences himself, but "everyday 
seekers" like you and me can't do it. 

In fact, if we try, we are often expelled from 
the religion. Just look at the Catholic Church -- 
many if not most of the people it now considers 
saints were persecuted *by the Church* during 
their lifetimes, because they were having mystical 
experiences that *they shouldn't have been having*.
It was only after they were safely dead that the
Church recognized them as "saints." They tried
to burn St. John of the Cross at the stake, 
ferchrissakes...and then they name him a *saint*?

So no, Judy, I've never been religious. And yes,
I have always viewed most religion as the *anti-
thesis* of self discovery. Still do. 



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