I am going to take the liberty of forwarding this to the food network. Oh, and BTW, they would never do it, but that would be a killer title to one of their shows. It would guarantee instant ratings. This post would not disappoint.
--- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, "curtisdeltablues" <curtisdeltablues@...> wrote: > > I'm gunna talk Summer. Steamy hot, makes every fragrant thing rise > into your nose like Jesus's mom ascending into heaven, Summer. > > It started yesterday when I stuck my nose into a box of white Virgina > peaches at a farmer's market. The smell was intoxicating as every > perfectly ripe fruit rose up and greeted me with the perfume of > Summer. For me trips to this market are church. It is a communion > with the season and nothing smells as good as the things in a > farmer's market in the steamy season. I'm a fan of all the seasons > and each has its foodie charms. But for take-your-clothes-off and pour a pitcher of lemonade mixed with ice tea all over your body > (here you will have to put in the type of body you would like to > see this drink streaming down)naked sensual joy, nothing beats > Summer. It's the heat baby. > > I have my Summer rituals. I plant a container garden of herbs with 12 > kinds of Basil from all over the world. (Yeah, I'm bragging here.) > I go out and grab a handful of whatever I touch first when I cook in > the Summer. This is key because I am an heirloom tomato fanatic. > Thwarted by a lack of enough sun to grow my own, I fork over a > percentage of my income each week to stay stocked up. I found this olive oil with a harvest date on it in Whole Foods, Prima something > which costs as much as a bottle of good bourbon. It is worth it > because when you pour it on the sliced tomatoes it also rises up to > meet your nose. The fresher the better with white wines and olive > oil. That's how I roll. Then I shower the tomato slices with > too much basil. I say too much because I am not subtle about this. I > am basil rich and I revel in it. Salt, pepper and here comes the > airplane into the hanger. That is a magical combination that only > comes together at this time of year. You can't do it in the Winter. > That green basil substitute they grow in greenhouses can't hold a > candle to the sharp flavor of the tiny leaves on my Greek Basil. And > if you had to ask about the tomatoes you wouldn't have read > this far. > > I associate eggplant with this season. I layer them with perorino and > mozzarella with vadalia onions and slices of stale bread that the > Tuscans use as an ingredient in lots of dishes. Sometimes I sacrifice > some tomatoes and of course shower each layer with olive oil and > fresh marjoram, oregano and basil. (Again not subtle, I want to taste > them!) I might pour a can of crushed tomatoes over the top before > topping it all with cheese. Bake it hot 400 to brown the edges in a > glass pan. I want to see brown when I open the oven 30-40 > minutes later. Let it set a bit and then carve away and let it wash > over the plate because waiting didn't set it up as you hoped, it is > one glorious mess. You can throw it on top of pasta if you want. Top > with the best olive oil you can find Mario Battali style and some > more fresh basil leaves and inhale. I mean breath baby, this is > Summer so fill your lungs. > > I bought two kinds of corn, one white delicate and sweet and one > mixed white and yellow on each cob which is not as sweet but has a > butteriness to it. I eat one of each alternating bites. Each has been > blessed with olive oil and salt and fresh ground pepper. I know the > purists eat it with nothing and some people eat it with butter, which > I love too. But I usually stock fantastic Irish butters in the Winter when I am craving heavier food so I don't have butter around in the Summer too often. I do have lard that I rendered myself but I would > never be so indulgent to...oh man I am putting my lard butter on an > ear tonight. It comes from special pigs who live in the woods and > have a great life and one bad day, just like the rest of us. Only > theirs is accomplished by a pro and we will have to make do with whatever random crap comes our way to snuff out our life. > > (Uncomfortable pause having alienated the vegetarians as well as > people who prefer their food porn without a dash of existential death > reality check vinaigrette. Sorry.) > > There are zukes and yellow squash including those funny ones that > look like flying saucers and are firmer, have you seen them? You can > put them in with the eggplant. But the money shot is the melons. Of > course I am referring to lady's breasts pushing against the > gauze-like fabric of Summer dresses...wait...sorry, I actually mean > melons this time. Cantaloup that you can smell right through > their patterned skin and of course the only fruit accused of being > racist, watermelons. I prefer them with seeds because I am a snob and > that goes against the yuppie trend for convenient everything. Plus my > farmer's market owner claims they are sweeter cuz when you mess with > genetics you get what you ask for and if you ask for no pits > sometimes the sweet gene goes too. This is complete bullshit of > course since I have had plenty of sweet seedless ones but I have to > maintain my specialness somehow and if it isn't because I am growing > in enlightenment then it has boiled down to watermelon preference. > (Oh how the mighty have fallen!) Sitting on my balcony surrounded by > my containers of herbs digging into a big slice of melon is Summer > mass for me. > > So where you might ask is that edgy touch in this piece, the one that > stands up and says "Curtis is a bluesman and a dangerous guy"? > Alcohol to the rescue! Let's have a little drinky-poo shall we? > > My Summer drink is the Brazilian national cocktail the Caipirnha. As usual I have strong opinions. The alcohol is not rum, it is a special > distillate from sugar cane,not molasses, called cachaca and is a > clear liquor, in violation of my usual policy that if it hasn't been in a barrel long enough to turn brown, I'm not throwing it down. It > has a character unlike any clear spirit that I am not a good enough > writer to describe. I just found one that actually does spend > 3 glorious months in XO cognac casks called Leblon and it is the > bomb. It just softens the sharpness a little. Any cachaca is good but > this is great. > > Let's get to work. You make a simple syrup (one to one) using a > natural cane sugar with all its brown wonderfulness intact. You cut > limes and squeeze out the juice then sprinkle sugar on the skins in a > cup and muddle it with a wooden muddler, which is a wooden cylinder > for crushing things in drinks. (If you don't have one yet use the > human thigh bone left over from your last voodoo ritual.) > This scrapes the skin and releases the oils into the drink. Mix it > till it tastes right, sour-sweet with a kick, you will know when you > get it right. You will know. Then if you have it, grab some leaves > from two kinds of mint and muddle that in. I know this is the Mohito > direction but take my word for it, what it lacks in authenticity it > makes up for in sparkling minty vegetative bliss. Fresh mint makes > it. Throw a few sprigs of peppermint on top so when you get to the > bottom of your glass you can eat the leaves with the last few > drops at the bottom. > > So to leave it on a high note I will add two final instructions. This > drink is your first drink of the evening but no matter how much you > want a second, switch to your usual drink of choice for the rest of > the evening. Do NOT spend an evening drinking sugary drinks if you > are over the age of 22 and not a cast member of the Jersey Shore. > Make your first a heavy pour and savor it all, but do not listen to > the devil in your head saying, "wow that was so great, a second > will be better!" It wont. Pour yourself a bourbon or grab a beer or wine next. If I was manufacturing Curtis's Caipirnha glasses I would > etch on the sides: > > "Enjoy your last Caipirnha of the night. You only get one so sip it then zip it." > > Secondly, if you are drinking this with someone you would like to see naked drenched in lemonade/ice tea mixture, you must kiss. Start with > a warm mouth closed lip hug that lasts long enough for them to get the message that this is not your last. Alternating sips continue > kissing while enjoying the combination of sweet, sour, mint, lime > oil,cachaca kick and the warmth of someone you love or has negotiated > a certain amount of time with you over the Internet. (Backpage.com > still takes those listing since Craigslist wimped out) But even > better if it is someone you love, off the meter, who you want to > share the essence of Summer with, who is looking forward to a plate of > sliced tomatoes covered in basil leaves, some sweet corn on the cob, > and the eggplant casserole bubbling in the oven after you finish this > drink together. > > You will melt together. > > It's the heat baby. >
