--- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, khazana108 <no_reply@...> wrote:
> --- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, "authfriend" <authfriend@> wrote:
> >
> > --- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, khazana108 <no_reply@> wrote:
> > > 
> > > --- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, "Robin Carlsen" <maskedzebra@> 
> > > wrote:
> > > > > > <snip>
> > > > > > > > Starbucks invitation still stands.
> > > > > > > 
> > > > > > > Look, I wouldn't mind if it was close by. But I think that
> > > > > > > you should have understanding if people who have been hurt
> > > > > > > by you in the past, resist meeting you. In this case,
> > > > > > > challenging them, or putting any kind of psychological
> > > > > > > pressure on them would surely be detrimental to your
> > > > > > > purpose.
> > > > > > 
> > [I wrote:]
> > > > > > He's done neither. It's an invitation, an offer, to anyone
> > > > > > who genuinely wants to know whether he has changed.
> > > > > 
> > > > > Yet, he posted it in the form of a challenge, and that is
> > > > > very inappropriate.
> > > > 
> > > > Not true, khazana: if I posed it as a challenge I would
> > > > disprove my very assertion. I do not challenge anyone these
> > > > days. You have seriously misread my first letter to Bill
> > > > Howell.
> > > 
> > > Maybe, Robin, but then, if I misread it, that is to say, if
> > > I misunderstood your intentions, so may have done others who
> > > are actually concerned.
> > 
> > That does not follow. Your command of English is faulty,
> > and you have enormous hostility toward Robin, so you're
> > prone to misunderstand him in a way that supports your own
> > pre/misconceptions.
> > 
> > > I am just saying that I don't understand this move of you,
> > > trying to 'prove' something (that you have changed). Why not
> > > just own up to all of them, and let them have their
> > > judgments, no matter what they where? It is, as if you can't
> > > accept these judgments, that is why you have to prove to
> > > them that you are different now.
> > 
> > Perfect example of what I just described.
> > 
> > Howell, "Brahmi," and Lord Knows have claimed he has not
> > changed. Why would Robin "own up" to what they claim if
> > he believes he *has* changed? Why would he accept what
> > he feels is an incorrect judgment?
> Wait, wait, you get it wrong. He offered this AFTER starting to read CULT, 
> and being dissatisfied with the way he was portrayed there.  CULT is only 
> about his past, and being dissatisfied with the perception of his 
> ex-followers about these past proceedings, he made this offer. I don't call 
> that owning up to it. 
> > It's entirely appropriate for him to *offer* to prove
> > he has changed to anyone who doubts it.
> And it is just as appropriate for them to say: Sorry, we are not interested, 
> you stole us a major part of our adult life, it took us years to get out, we 
> need not invest more time.
> > And he has said *dozens* of times that he accepts the
> > judgments of him from 25 years ago, so that was never in
> > any kind of dispute. 
> No, He didn't. Ask him yourself, or best read his posts, where he states that 
> he doesn't recognize himself in the book, and that this is not the truth 
> about him. For me that mean that he is in DENIAL. And he still wants to 
> influence them by 'proving' to them how much he has changed. 
> > Moreover, his own judgment of
> > himself has been more severe than anyone else's.
> So you believe. Other's seem to think different.
> > > > Lord Knows had no fear of me--even ten years ago. He wanted
> > > > to meet with me. I was not ready to meet with anyone at
> > > > that time. He did not come for our scheduled visit in
> > > > September not because he was afraid of me, but (I believe) 
> > > > because he disapproved of me, and was offended that I did
> > > > not agree to the conditions which he set for our time
> > > > together.
> > > > 
> > > > I think he thought me unworthy of his company.
> > > 
> > > I have no idea of course. I would say, whatever you meet
> > > now, in the form of Lord Knows and others, is your karma.
> > > Why not just accept it as it is? Why not just say: I am
> > > sorry, i was wrong all along.
> > 
> > What the *freak* is wrong with you, khazana? If he's said
> > once that he was wrong 25 years ago, he's said it literally
> > dozens of times. Again, that has never been in dispute.
> >
> Then what he wants the f*ck to prove? Why keep haunting these poor people?

I have had a very busy day today and have just now literally jumped into the 
middle of this very active day here at FFL. I may be behind the 8 ball just 
landing rather arbitrarily in this particular post as I know things are 
changing by the minute and lots of people are posting all over the place. But I 
just want to address this last sentence above.

First of all, I am going to speak from my perspective and I am probably 
repeating what others have already said but one thing I can give is a viewpoint 
and understanding that no one else posting here right now has because I am 
coming from a history with Robin that none of you have had. 

No one is "haunting" anyone. Robin never initiated his contact with me or his 
contact with LK. Both LK and I "found" Robin at FFL. I am not going to speak 
for or about LK, it is not my place or business to do so although I could fill 
in many blanks. I will speak for myself and this is based on my recent 
experience, understanding and communication with Robin. 

This is a man who has spent decades putting himself through all sorts of 
'rehabilitation' which, I believe, has included deep soul searching, intense 
self reflection, severe self recrimination, profound suffering and a continued 
self-imposed regimen to find the truest, most real way to live his life until 
the end of his allotted time here on this planet.  He is not looking for 
approval or forgiveness from his former 'followers', lovers or friends. He has 
lived a life of relative solitude and simplicity and probably the last thing he 
wants is to approach or be approached by people like Bill, Brahmi or LK. 
However, he has created an opening for this very thing to happen. LK, I 
believe, is the only likely candidate to have taken him up on this and in the 
end, decided for reasons of his own, (which I am privy to but will not 
disclose. However, I will say it does not involve any level of fear) to decline 
the offer. There is not one other soul on this planet from the 'old days' that 
I believe has any interest in meeting with Robin; they are all living their 
busy and full lives which include children, careers, spouses and their Catholic 

I am a fluke. For someone who blew a big, loud whistle at the end of days back 
in 1986-87 I was not the likeliest of candidates to be open to Robin Carlsen 26 
years later. But open I have been. And what has it cost me? Nothing. What 
threat has there been to me? None. What have I given up/lost/been deprived of. 
Zero. So I say to all of you, give it a rest, lighten up, have a heart; keep 
things in perspective. Do not judge someone on one person's version of things 
that happened so many years ago. LK, Brahmi, Bill Howell and I all lead full 
and happy and useful lives in spite of our having been confronted, denounced 
and thrown out on our ear. If people feel the need to judge Robin then do so on 
what you perceive in the present but don't let it be coloured too heavily with 
the events portrayed by Bill a quarter century ago. 


Reply via email to