--- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, Share Long wrote: > > Steve I always bow to your wisdom and expertise in terms of happy marriage which it's obvious you and your wife have created. Your relationship skills are also obvious here.Â
Can you say more about how marriage has to do with simply taking a vow? I am just saying, that that is where it starts. And hopefully you have done enough due diligence to know that you are committed to make it through the rocky times, which are bound to come. , and  Many simply take a vow and yet at least 50% of marriages end in divorce. Lots of experts have weighed in on the whole thing. One of my favorites is Dr. John Gottman of the Love Lab at Univ of Wash. They have an accuracy rate in the 90 percentile range in predicting which marriages will last, based on observation. One key aspect involves a 5 to 1 ratio, 5 positive interactions for every negative one. Well, that makes sense. In my case, even though we knew each other, and dated for two years, there was still quite a period of adjustment as we came from two different backgrounds, and had different religious and political beliefs. And over time that ratio changed, and has become more in line with what is a predictor of a successful marriage. > > Maybe it makes you smile because you simply live the day to day reality of having achieved a happy marriage. But some of us have to think about these things (-: Well, you work at it every day. And some days are easier than others. But it helps to know that you are committed to each other. Without that, you don't have much. > > > ________________________________ > From: seventhray27 > To: FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com > Sent: Tuesday, February 12, 2013 10:48 PM > Subject: [FairfieldLife] Re: Uber-narcissists who would fit right in on FFL > > >  > > --- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, Share Long wrote: > > > > I think everybody's interesting when we are first getting to know them.àBut if either of us is stuck, not growing, then eventually familiarity and or sameness will give rise to an experience of someone not being interesting. > This has sort of piqued my interest. It has so much to do with romance, and love, and long term committments, and what makes for a long term relationship. > With regard to marriage, I think a lot of it has to do with simply taking a vow. > For some reason this whole idea makes me smile. There are just so many factors that make a relationship last. And yes, spiritual and emotional growth have a lot to do with it, as well as being willing to change, and accept your partner for who they are as well. >  > àI like how Ammachi says that Love is never bored.àI notice when I'm what I'll call in the zone, I'm not bored, even if everything and everyone is the same on the surface of life.à> > > > > > > > > > ________________________________ > > From: Susan > > To: FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com > > Sent: Sunday, February 10, 2013 8:04 AM > > Subject: [FairfieldLife] Re: Uber-narcissists who would fit right in on FFL > > > > > > à> > This does not sound like narcissism, but psychosis/paranoia/schizophrenia or something in that ballpark. > > > > --- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, turquoiseb wrote: > > > > > > These folks remind me of people like Robin, who assume that they're > > > actually interesting enough that people would want to tune into their > > > lives full-time. > > > Cases of 'Truman Show' delusions on the rise as more people believe > > > they're the stars of their own reality TV programsReality TV shows are > > > making increasing numbers of people convinced that they're the stars of > > > their own, unwanted television programs. > > > Psychiatrists are treating more people for so-called 'Truman Show' > > > delusions -- named after the 1998 movie starring Jim Carrey as a man > > > who spends his entire life unwittingly at the center of a fictional > > > world that's being broadcast to millions of homes. > > > > > > The startling cases often afflict successful people who develop > > > paranoid fantasies that they're being filmed at all times and that the > > > world that's in front of them isn't real. > > > [Truman Show] > > > They're being watched: People suffering from 'Truman Show' delusions > > > believe they are the star of a TV program like Jim Carrey's character > > > in the 1998 movie > > > > > > Their friends and loves ones are actors. The news they see on TV is > > > made up to control the way they think. The things that happen to them > > > are merely events staged for the amusement of others. > > > > > > > > > The result can turn disturbing and even violent. > > > In 2009, Anthony Waterlow killed his father and his sister in Australia > > > because he believed they were broadcasting his life to the world as > > > part of a game show to either murder him or convince him to kill > > > himself. > > > > > > During a psychological exam, he specially mentioned 'The Truman Show,' > > > according to the Sydney Morning Herald > > > > > -20110412-1dcpz.html#ixzz1wHr2bspd> . > > > > > > [Truman show] > > > Affliction: The paranoid suspicion of being spied on has driven some > > > people to violence -- even murder -- in event years > > > > > > In 2007, psychiatrist William Johns III allegedly assaulted a > > > 2-year-old and his mother in New York City after he left his home in > > > Florida because he 'had to get out of the Truman Show' that he believed > > > was filming him in his home town, according to ABC News > > > . > > > > > > > > > Drs Joel and Ian Gold, researchers at New York University and McGill > > > University in Montreal, respectively, recently published a series of > > > case studies about suffers of 'Truman Show' delusions. > > > > > > > > > Their article in the journal Cognitive Neuropsychiatry > > > > > > , followed five patients who believed their lives were the center of a > > > secret TV show. > > > > > > > > > One patient traveled to New York City and walked in a federal building > > > and demanded to see 'the director.' He said he had to come to Manhattan > > > because he believed the World Trade Center attacks had been faked for > > > the TV show being filmed around him, according to BuzzFeed > > > > > mmon> . > > > > > > He said he had to see for himself whether the twin towers were still > > > standing. If they weren't, he said, it would be final proof that he was > > > the unwilling star of a reality TV program. > > > > > >
