--- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, anonymousff2 <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
> --- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, a_non_moose_ff <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> 
> wrote:
> [SNIP]
> > > anon2 replies (directed at TurqoiseB):
> > > What I was trying to convey was some explanation for why your 
> > > efforts failed to help the person you were attempting to help. 
> 
> a_non_moose_ff:
> > HAHAHAHA. Now thats funny.
> 
> anon2:
> For some reason, this response gave me a warm, fuzzy feeling - nice 
> to know that I produced laughter in you. Didn't feel attacked in the 
> least. Even though my comment wasn't intended to be funny.

Sorry, I was not laughing at you. Or anyone. Just laughing at the
notion that Barry's motives were "attempting to help". I should have
been more clear.


> 
> I am inclined to wonder about motivations. Is this person 
> (TurqoiseB) making a joke so as to be more appreciated by the 
> regular FFL readers, or making a joke because he thinks it will help 
> the person being laughed at to grow (e.g. let go of intellect), or 
> making a joke to think better of himself, or making a joke to put 
> down someone else, or ...?
> 
> The idea that this was about helping someone else to grow came from 
> TurqoiseB's own examples of how "enlightened" masters make fun of 
> their students to help them to laugh a little more at themselves, 
> and, presumably to grow as a result. And the Nose Glasses story - an 
> interesting management approach.

Thats part of laughter. The  joint image of Barry in a teacher's role,
to non-exisating "students", whom he is trying to help. 

While I don't take barry's laughter at me as insult (sticks and
stones...), or even offensive, I don't believe his motive was to help.
His story makes the contrast all that much ironic, and funnier.

> Anyway, if I were sincerely trying to help someone, and I found out 
> it wasn't working, I would try a different tactic, rather than argue 
> with the person and/or interested bystanders about why it should 
> have worked, and isn't everyone else just so dumb not to realize 
> this.

As judy has said, "Thats our barry!"

 
> Another question that comes to mind: When is it appropriate to 
> attempt to help someone who hasn't come to you seeking your wisdom 
> or your help?

Unsolicited help is said to be on the same order of sin as caviling (a
big one) somewhere in vedic lit.
 
> And another: How much of the conversation on FFL is really about 
> helping, sharing etc.? Some of it is, certainly.

I would hope it were more. That was the point of my original comment
to Barry "Lets stick to substance".
 
> anon2
>






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