wrote:
>
> Jim, would be able and willing to talk a bit about what it was
like to have Guru Dev appear
> to you? I am especially interested in what he seemed like because
his pictures seem
> extremely intense but somber. Even the brief movies are hard for
me to get. Was there
> love or softness there in him when you saw him?
>
Sure- no problem. I hope I am not boring anyone who has heard this
before.
So the experience grew for me. After I got the sidhis I moved to
southern cal to see a friend and lived in santa barbara for several
years. The best I remember is I used to go on long bike rides while
there, and during these rides Guru Dev's face and enrobed shoulders
would appear in my center sight. It was nice and I didn't think much
of it, since I was praying to him a lot then, and pretty much
unhappy.
Then that passed and became kind of a fixture in my awareness;
whenever I needed to see him, I'd see that much of him, but it was a
little dry and static after awhile.
Next I found myself in Washington DC, and I was still doing sidhis.
Got married and a house and used to go running for exercise. One
day, probably late 92 I had this experience in my center sight where
I approached the feet of Guru Dev- not out of some false prostration
or mood making, but saw him in the distance and as I approached, I
approached his feet. That's just the way it is to approach someone
like him head on. Saw his toes and the hem of his robe in great
detail. Laid my head at his feet. Learned a lot about power
relationships and what all that meant, "sitting on the right hand
of..." and where the language of positioning came from.
Anyway, one day in Spring 93 as best as I can recall I was doing
something in the rec room/walk out basement of my house and Guru Dev
was there with me, filling my body with bliss and clarity, right
there with me, existing as if in parallel sight, every detail clear.
Every time I looked at him, his shoulder, or into his eyes, or his
hair or whatever, I would transcend right down to rockbottom Being,
my body turned to crystal. At some point I sat with him and we
traveled together out into the galaxies and I recall sitting in
lotus way way out in space, far far from earth. At another point,
and to answer your question, we went for a walk outside and it was
like being with your infinite dad or very best friend ever. I was
with him for about 3 days.
Guru Dev appears as a stern countenance but that is just his
reflection of Shiva, destroyer of ignorance. His energy is purest
love and acceptance. He allows me to do anything I want to, and I
respect that by only calling him when I have to.
So it was a life changing experience, and he is my role model. The
best.
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