===== Mark Morford's Notes & Errata =====
SFGate.com - Friday, February 2, 2007
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Is
<http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/gate/archive/2007/02/02/notes02020
7.DTL&nl=fix> Tom Cruise The Messiah?
The Church of Scientology certainly thinks so. What if they're
oh-so-horrifically right?
By Mark Morford
Oh my sweet Jesus with a resigned grin and an empty bottle of scotch, what
if it's all true?
What if the <http://www.thesun.co.uk/article/0,,4-2007030603,00.html>
astonishing proclamation made by top gooberhead Scientologist (and official
Friend of Tom) David Miscavige
<http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_Miscavige> is urgent and accurate and
Tom Cruise really is that happy cult's personal Jesus, a true deity who may
not be recognized in this lifetime for his divine contributions but who, in
the future, will be "worshipped like Jesus" for what he has done for
humankind and therefore we have all been looking at "Jerry McGuire" and
"Days of Thunder" and "MI:III" exactly wrong?
Can you imagine? No? Me neither. Here, try this bottle of Ambien and this
forced ingestion of 3,000 powdered copies of Us Weekly and this enthusiastic
partial lobotomy. There. Can you imagine now? Excellent.
After all, is it not dazzling to ponder? Is it not the most beautiful and
terrifying thing this side of Lynne Cheney in a ball gag and the Olsen Twins
eating ham sandwiches off each other's sunken rib cages? Tom Cruise and
Jesus, together at last, and not in a bad Spielberg flick full of giant
alien spider-pods with Tom sprinting over barren blood-drenched landscapes
to save his cute blond child from being eaten alive. It's enough to make you
consider Jainism. Or moving to Tibet. ...
(click
<http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/gate/archive/2007/02/02/notes02020
7.DTL&nl=fix> here to read the rest)
(Full URL:
http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/gate/archive/2007/02/02/notes020207
.DTL&nl=fix)
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