--- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, "Alex Stanley" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > > --- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, Bhairitu <noozguru@> wrote: > [snip] > > Perusing topics someone might as what does my recent topic on > > Janene Garafalo joinng the "24" cast have anything to do with > > TM? It doesn't but we've discussed "24" here because some folks > > here are "24" fans and will find it quirky that the very outspoken > > liberal former Air America Radio co-host and SNL alumni is joining > > a show produced by a bunch of righties. I guess that might get me > > to tune in once again even though the series has become so > > ridiculous that it plays like a 1930's Saturday matinée serial. > > I've even considered that they might start letting the cast > > improvise rather than follow a badly written script in need of a > > couple more re-writes. That might be a vast improvement. > > The last season of 24 sucked so mightily that I swore I wouldn't > watch this season. But, chances are, I'll watch. > > What I'd like to know is who would win in a battle between Jack > Bauer and Chuck Norris. Would there even be a winner? Or would > all all of creation simply vaporize in a flash of light as the > two entities meet?
I can speak to this with some authority. I was once face to face in a karate contest with Chuck Norris. Bauer is toast. It was a small martial arts contest in Southern California, and they had a low turnout among participants, not enough to warrant separate brown belt and black belt competitions. So they threw us all our names in a big hat and matched us up with whoever came out, black belt or brown belt. I was a lowly brown belt, and in my first match I drew a black belt from the competing school in our neighboring city, and I whupped his ass. I was *bad*. And so when, in my next match I discovered that I'd drawn another black belt, I was still thinkin' *bad*. "Black belt, schmack belt...I whupped one of them... bring the rest of them ON." And then the black belt smiled at me as he bowed, and suddenly my feelings of *bad*ness began to fade. The fight lasted about four seconds. I glided out onto the mat with my *bad* face on, and the black belt just smiled again and did something I never even saw, and the judges were holding up their flags. It was over. I bowed sheepishly and walked back to the bench, having learned an important lesson about *bad* and how ephemeral it is. He wasn't Chuck Norris the movie star then. He was on his way to (I think) his first World Karate Championship. I was later told that it was one of his famous double back kicks that I never saw, but whatever it was, it did the trick. And it would do the trick on Jack Bauer, too.
