A sign in the local Bank Lobby reads: "Please note that this Bank is
installing new Drive-through teller machines enabling customers to
withdraw
cash without leaving their vehicles. Customers using this new facility
are
requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their
accounts. After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE procedures
have
been developed Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender."
MALE PROCEDURE:
1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Put down your car window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Put window up.
7. Drive off.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
FEMALE PROCEDURE:
1. Drive up to cash machine.
2. Reverse and back up the required distance to align car window with
the
machine.
3. Set parking brake, put the window down.
4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate
card.
5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up
6. Attempt to insert card into machine.
7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive
distance from the car.
8. Insert card.
9. Re-insert card the right way.
10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the
inside
back page.
11. Enter PIN.
12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
13. Enter amount of cash required.
14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
15. Retrieve cash and receipt.
16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.
17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of
checkbook.
18. Re-check makeup.
19. Drive forward 2 feet.
20. Reverse back to cash machine.
21. Retrieve card.
22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot
provided.
23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.
24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
25. Redial person on cell phone
26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
27. Release Parking Brake.
SEND THIS TO A MAN WHO NEEDS A LAUGH AND
TO THE LADIES YOU THINK CAN HANDLE IT!
_____________________________________________________________________
Aberdeen Asset Management PLC is an independent fund management group.
With offices worldwide we provide high quality investment management
services and products to a global customer base. Please visit our website
at
http://www.aberdeen-asset.com
IMPORTANT CONFIDENTIALITY NOTICE This email is confidential and is
intended solely for the addressee. If you are not the intended recipient,
please notify the sender immediately and delete this email. Any
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copying, distribution or use of this communication is prohibited and may
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unlawful. In accordance with normal business practice, and applicable
regulations, all electronic communications with the Aberdeen Asset
Management Group of companies may be monitored.
Aberdeen Asset Management PLC, Company Number: SC82015, and having its
Registered Office at 10 Queen's Terrace, Aberdeen AB10 1YG, is the
holding
company for the Aberdeen Asset Management Group of companies. Its
operational subsidiaries include Aberdeen Asset Managers Limited and
Aberdeen Unit Trust Managers Limited, Edinburgh Fund Managers plc,
Edinburgh
Portfolio Limited, Edinburgh Unit Trust Managers Limited, authorised and
regulated by the Financial Services Authority, who are members of the
Aberdeen Marketing Group.
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