Glenda, As usual, I think that Wendy always states things perfectly. I've been reading your story, but I've been unable to think of what to say. I had to decide what I felt first. Wendy's honesty put me in the right direction.
I think it's easy to place blame and to point a finger at you (Glenda). I was saddened and confused about the circumstances and why things happened the way they did, but I think that I am not above reproach. I live with the guilt of how I mistreated a kitty and a dog in the past. Just like Wendy, I am ashamed of my actions. In junior high/high school, we had a dog that we didn't give attention to. My mom had 5 girls, a lousy husband, and we had trouble taking care of ourselves, so the dog suffered too. Luckily, we found her a good home. Then, as if I didn't learn my lesson, I took in a kitty when I moved out. I was not in a good place to take care of another living being--dealing with a loss and very sad. I didn't play with kitty, didn't scoop litter as much as I should have, just didn't care. Since I didn't really care so much about my own life at the time, kitty got left out too. Luckily, I found someone to take him after I realized that I was not being fair to him. We can all say, "How could you do such a cruel and senseless thing?!" and we can all say that we would never do such a thing. But, can we be sure? I've come a long way in my understanding of animals, creation, etc. I've made a long journey (in my short life thus far) in appreciating our fellow creatures, but I wasn't always that way. I wasn't outright mean, but I was neglectful and immature. We all have things to learn and past mistakes to atone for (be they relationships with animals, humans, whatever). Some of us have reached this point by many different experiences and avenues. While there is no excuse for what we've done, there's no reason to dwell on it. We should acknowledge our mistakes, forgive ourselves and others, and vow to make a difference with our lives. We cannot wallow in despair and regret; instead we must commit to an improved future--which you are doing Glenda. Good for you. Best wishes, Melissa -----Original Message----- From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] On Behalf Of wendy Sent: Thursday, August 09, 2007 11:43 PM To: [email protected] Subject: To Glenda re. Marmalade Glenda, I have been reading about you and Marmalade the past few days and mulling over all I have read. I can completely see how each person can feel the way they do. What happened is horrific. I know all of us are saddened by it. Obviously, you have learned your lesson and I can tell you feel badly about what happened. I don't want to say something hurtful or mean, although what happened to Marmalade, honestly, has made me angry and sad. However, as it has been pointed out, this happens every day to hundreds of animals in the world. Marmalade is just one. A grass roots foster/rescue program is needed, but who among us has the time or is willing to sacrifice? We live in a damn rat race. And I do not think that shelter work is every person's calling. I am starting up a pet sitting business and taking care of my brood, among all the other stuff going on in my life. Volunteering isn't part of the mix right now, but I do feel like I'm doing my part in my little corner of the world, for now. I am glad you feel you can come here for help. I think the people here are wonderful. Hideyo is very intense. I personally think she feels things more intensely than many of us do; that observation is based on what I have seen in the past. I think she will come around again. She's angry and hurt now, as many of us are, and you are the easiest target for that, unfortunately. However, even though you made a mistake, it was not intentional, and you were trying to rectify it. We ALL make mistakes. Every last one of us. One time, when I was just a girl, one of our cats (we had many) attacked my face. I was trying to pet him and talking to him really sweet, and he just attacked me and scratched me up. I was bleeding pretty good from several places, but my heart hurt more than my head. He jumped off the bed and walked off like he was the cat's meow and I kicked him in the behind. I was probably 8. He died a few days after that. He couldn't pee and my mom was the type not to waste money on our pets; she had to make sure she always had a six pack handy. I have always felt really badly about that. In hindsight, it's quite possible that this kitty had crystals or already had a UTI. But I'll never know and I choose to carry the grief that comes along with the responsibility of a mistake. I know there are probably others here who have unintentionally hurt an animal. I am certainly holding no grudge against you as I have no room to judge your mistake. I do hope that, as others have said, it can be turned into something good, for little Marmalade's sake. That is all that can be done now. Prayers going out for your heavy heart. :) Wendy "Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful committed citizens can change the world - indeed it is the only thing that ever has!" ~~~ Margaret Meade ~~~ ----- Original Message ---- From: glenda Goodman <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> To: [email protected] Sent: Thursday, August 9, 2007 12:01:23 PM Subject: Fwd: MARMALADE...THE OUTCOME... --- glenda Goodman <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > Date: Thu, 9 Aug 2007 09:59:33 -0700 (PDT) > From: glenda Goodman <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> > Subject: MARMALADE...THE OUTCOME... > To: [email protected] > > HELLO EVERYONE, > THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR THE ADVICE AND SUPPORT. > THE > WORST HAS HAPPENED. I FEEL REALLY HORRIBLE RIGHT > NOW. > I JUST WANT TO LET EVERYONE KNOW HOW THE WORST > HAPPENED: > WHAT I WAS TOLD WAS HE WAS PUT DOWN, BY MISTAKE. HIS > PAPER WORK WAS NOT READ. FOR AS OFTEN AS I WENT DOWN > THERE AND BUGGED THEM, I GUESS I ASSUMED EVERYONE > KNEW. EVEN THOUGH HE WAS IN THE 'WILD CAT' > SECTION...I > GUESS THE LESSON HERE IS: > > EVEN IF YOU KNOW YOU ARE MAKING PEOPLE ANGRY AND > UPSET > WHEN IT COMES TO PROTECTING AN ANIMAL DO NOT BE > AFRAID > TO GET IN SOMEONE'S FACE. THE FACT I DID NOT RUB IT > IN > A LITTLE MORE ON MY RIDE HOME FROM WORK TUESDAY > NIGHT > MIGHT HAVE BEEN THE REASON THIS MISTAKE HAPPENED. > > THE DIRECTOR, A REALLY SPECIAL PERSON, WHO I DO LOVE > AND RESPECT AND WITH WHOM I HAVE A GOOD > RELATIONSHIP, > TOLD ME THE MINUTE THE MISTAKE WAS REALIZED SHE TOOK > MARMALADE'S LITTLE BODY TO THE CLINIC DOWN THE > STREET, > TO THE VET. HE WAS TESTED BY A GAL NAMED DARCY AT > MIDTOWN ANIMAL HOSPITAL IN GERING, NEBRASKA. THE > TEST > WAS NEGATIVE FOR FeLV AND FIV. THEY ESTIMATED THE > CAT > TO BE ABOUT 2-YEARS OLD. I WAS TOLD THEY FIRST > NOTICED > A LOT OF BATTLE SCARS ON HIM ,SO THEY THOUGHT HE > MIGHT > TEST POSITIVE...WELL, HE DID NOT TEST > POSITIVE! > > I TOLD DEB S. , THE DIRECTOR, ON THE PHONE I WOULD > HAVE FOUGHT HER TOOTH AND NAIL TO SAVE THIS CAT IF > HE > WERE ALIVE AND TESTED OUT LIKE HE DID AND BEING > YOUNG > LIKE HE WAS...SHE COMPLETELY UNDERSTANDS WHERE I"M > COMING FROM AND I DO BELIEVE WE COULD HAVE COME TO A > SOLUTION SOMEHOW. SHE IS A VERY GOOD PERSON AND LIKE > THE REST OF US ,BUT WITH A VERY HARD JOB...THE GAL, > A > WORKER AT THE HUMANE SOCIETY TOLD ME EVERYONE FELT > SICK YESTERDAY AFTER THIS HAPPENED. > > WE ALL HAVE SUCH A LONG WAY TO GO TO MASTER THE > PERFECT WAYS TO PROTECT OUR ANIMALS. IT REALLY IS > JUST > SUCH A HARD WORLD...I THINK EVERYONE OF US COULD > JUST > CRY OUR EYES OUT ALL DAY LONG FOR ALL THE SADNESS IN > THE WORLD. I DO APPRECIATE YOU GUYS SO MUCH! > > I WILL BE TALKING WITH A COUPLE OF THESE FERAL CAT > ORGANIZATIONS TO SEE WHAT IT TAKES TO GET SOMETHING > STARTED HERE. > THIS MORNING WHEN I WAS TALKING TO DEB, OUR HS > DIRECTOR HERE, SHE TOLD ME SHE DID NOT LIKE THE TNR > PROGRAMS THAT MUCH. I PERSONALLY, COULD ONLY AGREE > WITH SUCH PROGRAMS IF ALL THE CATS WERE DISEASE FREE > AND VERY WELL CARED FOR...THAT TAKES A LOT OF PEOPLE > WILLING TO BE VERY INVOLVED. > I WILL TELL YOU, I LIVED IN MAUI, HAWAII FOR CLOSE > TO > FIVE YEARS , 2001-2005. I WAS ON THE BOARD OF THEIR > HUMANE SOCIETY FOR ROUGHLY A YEAR + AND I BECAME > AWARE > OF THE FERAL CAT SITUATION THERE, WHICH IS MASSIVE. > I > HAD FRIENDS INVOLVED WHO WERE SO SELFLESS, SO > DEDICATED...THERE IS HUGE SUPPORT THERE FOR SUCH > PROGRAMS...SADLY, ALL FREE ROAMING CATS ARE HARD ON > BIRDS...SOMETHING TO CONSIDER...IT IS JUST A MATTER > OF > SPAYING/NEUTERING. WITH ALL THE PEOPLE WORKING SO > HARD > I CANNOT IMAGINE AN END TO THE PROBLEM,BUT THEY ARE > PUTTING A DENT IF ONLY TO KEEP THE POPULATIONS IN > CHECK... > I'M OFF TO MY JOB. I FEEL A LITTLE BETTER HAVING YOU > GUYS OUT THERE TO TALK TO. IF I DECIDE TO START UP A > PROGRAM HERE BY TRYING TO GATHER PEOPLE WILLING TO > GET > INVOLVED, IT WILL BE CALLED "MARMALADE'S WILD KITTY > ORGANIZATION, SOMETHING LIKE THAT? I SERIOUSLY FEEL > HE > WAS A SPECIAL CAT...BUT AREN'T THEY ALL? > I HAVE ALWAYS BELIEVED SOMETHING BAD NEEDS TO BRING > SOMETHING GOOD IN IT'S PLACE. > FOR ALL OF YOU OUT THERE THAT MIGHT BE A LITTLE LOST > ON MY STORY HERE, THE REASON I WANTED THIS CAT > TESTED, > IN THE FIRST PLACE, WAS BECAUSE HE TANGLED WITH MY > ADORED KITTY, FEETO. FEETO GOT BIT ON HIS FACE ABOUT > 8-DAYS AGO WHILE THIS CAT WAS CHECKING OUR HOME OUT > AS > A PROSPECT FOR A GOOD LIFE. FEETO HAD JUST RAN > OUTSIDE > TO THE BASE OF OUR FRONT STEP. > MARMALADE, ALSO, SPENT TIME AT MY FRIEND'S DOWN THE > STREET...HE JUST SHOWED UP IN OUR NEIGHBORHOOD A > COUPLE WEEKS AGO.I DID ADMIRE THE INTELLIGENCE OF > THIS > CAT FOR THE WAY HE THOUGHT AND I RESPECT A SURVIVOR. > HE WAS BEAUTIFUL TOO, WITH HUGE WHITE FEET. I LOVE > KITTY FEET! I STILL PICTURE HIM...HE DID MAKE AN > IMPRESSION ON ME. > THANK YOU GUYS...LATER, GLENDA > > > > > ____________________________________________________________________________ ________ > Fussy? Opinionated? Impossible to please? Perfect. > Join Yahoo!'s user panel and lay it on us. > http://surveylink.yahoo.com/gmrs/yahoo_panel_invite.asp?a=7 > > > ____________________________________________________________________________ ________Ready for the edge of your seat? Check out tonight's top picks on Yahoo! TV. http://tv.yahoo.com/ ____________________________________________________________________________ ________ Luggage? GPS? Comic books? 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