Because I Do Not Know The Stars
========================

There is a certain failure in me
for the things I do not know;
a certain sadness in my heart
for the things I like to think
I would have learned by now.

1.
Piano; I may have learned well
had I owned one. But it is
a very middle class thing to own;
my parents could only pretend
and could not come through
on such things. I ended up
with an older acoustic guitar
which I can play, but despise.

2.
But I do not know the names
of stars; of arrangements up there.
I could not tell you to look up
on certain nights and be right
about what you would see.
It seems to me that I am forced
to look without understanding
all these pinpricks in velvet.
But I would need to know
just in case you would ever ask.

3.
I do not know the latitudes
of capitals; nor the location
of most states, could not name
chemical processes or tell you
what habeus corpus was
without checking a dictionary.
But, I know a few good poets,
don't you think, and I know you,
enough to be a profession.

I write love poems accidentally
these days.

4.
I seem to have picked up
a lot of theory somehow:
politics, art, even vague notions
of economics. But I could not
identify any painter, aside from
the most famous; could not
identify the 18th president;
couldn't explain
why I have no money left.

I am learning more
about the weather,
because I want to look up
and tell you if it will rain
based on the shapes in the sky.
This seems like a skill
bordering on sorcery; but
we always believe the men
on TV. You should be able
to have that faith in me.

5.
Because I do not know the stars,
will I have an excuse
to look at the sky someday,
with you? I will help you
to count them, and I can tell you
how if the number we reached
was the national debt
it would most likely
not affect inflation, although
the higher the number
the smaller amount of stars
would be invested
into corporate growth
and infrastructure.

6.
I never knew how a car worked
until last week. It is a series
of explosions. Air mixes with gas,
transforming into vapor, which
explodes and moves a tiny piston.

I have spent all my life on religion,
could tell you anything you wanted
about bahai to zoroastrianism
but look, here is this miracle
under my hood, every day
unnoticed.

Vapors moving pistons,
moving me and you
towards some hill
where I will not be able
to name the stars
while I don't play
a song on my guitar
written just for you;
but in every gesture
is this intention:
to bring any star
down to earth
for studying
at your request.

7.
The world is round,
I know this. And the birds
fly south, for the winter.
I know that there is
no way to measure
the weight of fire
and that you are afraid
of moths.

I know that light is both
a particle and a wave;
that you cannot measure
the exact speed of a thing
and its exact composition
at the same time. And so
your thoughts must travel
at precisely 186,000 miles
per second.



-e.




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