Maybe the truth is as much in the autumn as it is in the spring. It can mean so much to say to the blades of grass: I know you are down beneath this weight of snow; and I believe you will make it through, to peek through cracks and see the sun.

Green trees might just be pretending
until fall. Abandoning apples to gravity
and going to sleep; we say this tree
is not a tree until it is ripe with fruit;
when the tree begins to fool us
into our own belief in summer.

Of course, it becomes this truth:
the autumn and the summer are true
a tree may have no leaves and flower,
the soil may be frozen and filled
with fields of marigolds; the same tree,
the same ground, while our lives
are stuck in just a single season.

This winter, I am alone,
and I cannot fake warmth.
A thousand conversations
recorded and transcribed
prove my own transparency
but I can destroy the record,
tell you all it's been misplaced.
Inside of me, a leaf descends
and there is rustling in my gait,
and I save these acorn proofs
for when the sun stops looking,
a squirrel in search of meaning
in the biggest hollow trunk.

The truth is in the trembling of the leaf
before it falls; so we look to the ground
to see snow where grass should be,
as if there should be anything else
but now.


-e.







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