I've been searching and searching for some consistent info regarding the 
complete setup required to get flex 3 to talk directly to a cfc on a REMOTE 
coldfusion server.  

I've got access to the coldfusion server admin.  

My problems.

1.  Where is the flex gateway specified (or flash)?  I see all these articles 
saying it's at www.mydomain.com/flex2gateway.  I have no idea how to verify 
that and when I do a remote call to it in flex it says....

MessagingError message='Destination 'http://www.mydomain.com/flex2gateway/' 
either does not exist or the destination has no channels defined (and the 
application does not define any default channels.)']

2.  So, I couldn't find the default flex gateway so I created my own under the 
events gateway tab.  I gave it an id of flexRMS a type of CFML and pointed the 
cfc path to the cfc I want to call and set the config file to 

I can't connect to that either

3.  If I could connect, which I can't, I need to point to a different 
components folder on the server that holds all the cfcs that I really need to 

4.  So, I thought well maybe I need to configure my flex project and specify 
that I'm using Coldfusion as the server type.  I check Use Remote Object Access 
Service, then specify Coldfusion Flash Remoting Then I get to the page where 
I'm supposed to check between Coldfusion installation type, Standalone or 
Deployed to J2EE (I've got no idea what to do here) anything I check or fill 
out tells me that I've got no config files in the WEB-INF folder under flex 
when I click the validate Configuration.

Can somebody throw me a bone here.  Jeez

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