Story 2 was my favourite.
I particularly like Solo For Loser and
Clarinet
-----Original Message-----
From: owner-[email protected]
[mailto:owner-[email protected]]
On Behalf Of A Chair
Sent: 25 April 2006 01:20
To: [email protected]
Subject: *** SPAM *** FLUXLIST: Works
lost on an abandoned blog
I found these on a blog that I've since disowned four
weeks after I started it, along with some mandalas:
"Museo" Revolt!
Several drummers (as many as possible) are to
gather outside of warehouses, office buildings, music stores, or recording
studios affiliated with major record labels and play simultaneously and as
ostensibly as their abilities allow. They will only be guided by a
stopwatch. When the stopwatch reaches 20'00", they are to dissemble
and leave.
Saturday, April 3rd, 2004
PIRATEWAR (A film)
Get a camera.
Use cardboard, glue, or any kind of craft/hobby to make pirate hats, swords,
shields, and eyepatches.
Gather 25 to 100 people and have them dress as pirates.
To make the film, take your pirates to a large public area (i.e. a busy
intersection) and have them battle to the "death" while yelling the
worst pirate cliches they can think of.
Continue for as long as possible and send the film to me (A Chair, 131 Vanesse Rd, Morrisville,
VT, 05661)
Wednesday, March 17th, 2004
Puzzle Piece
Walk up to someone working on a puzzle.
Pick up a piece at random and exclaim "if you don't do it, I'm going to
eat this puzzle piece!"
Before s/he can respond, yell "Do it!"
Repeat twice, count to three, and then eat and walk away.
Tuesday, March 23rd, 2004
Tube Piece
Argue that everything is phallic or uterine.
Tuesday, March 16th, 2004
Chicken Man
Debone a chicken and pound it into a
phallus. Cook until charred.
Tuesday, March 23rd, 2004
Boot Piece
Imagine what you can do with three boots and
two feet.
For Pants
Take four pairs of pants and perform any
action, most duly encouraged is getting naked with them.
Wednesday, March 17th, 2004
Solo For Loser and Clarinet
Lose the clarinet and get a job.
Tuesday, March 16th, 2004
Doctor Variations
Perform surgery on a shoe, but clean every
utensil with your tongue.
Tuesday, March 16th, 2004
Story 1
Today, a bear. Wondered all over the green
marshes and carelessly stumbled on fragments of complex rocks. It bellowed out,
"Nobody knows what you do with your lungs!" Nobody knows what you do.
There were too many to be alpha bets. It continued on its journey only to find
a brass onion on a dead plate. Finally, the juxtaposed lemon vapors caught him
off-guard and bit him.
Two days later, he arrived at a garden admiring the colors of the rotting
mammalian piano frame discarded by the apartment home. I sighed and exclaimed,
"the nation guarantees."
Tuesday, March 16th, 2004
Story 2
A melting imbecile watched as a tin can melted from the fire. Reflecting on his
childhood, he saw the washing machine in a hospital. Later he ended his life by
asking the shiny velvet gentleman to slit his pancreas.
Wednesday, March 17th, 2004
