Does weeping and shedding tears for the deceased cause him any harm? 

Praise be to Allah.   

It was narrated in more than one hadeeth from the Prophet (peace and blessings 
of Allaah be upon him) that the deceased suffers because of the weeping of his 
family over him. For example, Muslim narrated in his Saheeh (927) from Ibn 
‘Umar that Hafsah wept for ‘Umar, and he said, “Calm down, O my daughter! Do 
you not know that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be 
upon him) said: ‘The deceased suffers because of his family’s weeping over 
him’?” 

And it was also proven that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon 
him) wept for the deceased on more than one occasion, such as when he wept at 
the death of his son Ibraaheem, as was narrated by al-Bukhaari (2/105) and 
Muslim (7/76) from the hadeeth of Anas (may Allaah be pleased with him). He 
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) also wept at the death of one of 
his daughters, whilst she was being buried, as was narrated by al-Bukhaari, 
1258 from the hadeeth of Anas (may Allaah be pleased with him). 

And he (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) wept when one of his 
grandchildren died, as narrated by al-Bukhaari (1284) and Muslim (923), from 
the hadeeth of Usaamah ibn Zayd (may Allaah be pleased with them both). 

If it is asked, how can we reconcile between the hadeeths which forbid weeping 
for the deceased and those which permit it? 

The answer is: 

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) explained that in a 
hadeeth narrated by al-Bukhaari (7377) and Muslim (923) from Usaamah ibn Zayd, 
according to which the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) wept 
for the son of one of his daughters. Sa’d ibn ‘Ubaadah said: “What is this, O 
Messenger of Allaah?” He said, “This is compassion which Allaah puts in the 
hearts of His slaves. Allaah shows mercy to those of His slaves who are 
merciful.” 

Al-Nawawi said: 

What this means is that Sa’d thought that all kinds of weeping were haraam, and 
that shedding tears was haraam. He thought that the Prophet (peace and 
blessings of Allaah be upon him) had forgotten that, so he reminded him. But 
the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) explained that simply 
weeping and shedding tears is neither haraam nor makrooh, rather it is 
compassion and is something good. What is haraam is wailing and lamenting, and 
weeping that is accompanied by one or both of these actions, as the Prophet 
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Allaah does not punish for 
tears that are shed or for sorrow in the heart, rather He punishes or shows 
mercy because of this” – and he pointed to his tongue. 

Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah was asked – as it says in al-Fataawa, 24/380 – 
whether the weeping of a mother or brothers and sisters has any effect on the 
deceased. He said: “Rather there is no sin in tears shed by the eyes and sorrow 
in the heart, but lamenting and wailing are forbidden.” 

With regard to weeping for the deceased even after some time has passed, there 
is nothing wrong with that, so long as it is not accompanied by wailing, 
lamenting or feeling displeased with the will and decree of Allaah. 

Muslim (976) narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: 
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) visited the grave of 
his mother and wept, and those who were around him also wept. He said: “I asked 
my Lord for permission to pray for forgiveness for her, and He did not give me 
permission; and I asked Him for permission to visit her grave and He gave me 
permission. So visit the graves, for they will remind you of death.” 

And Allaah knows best.

 

 

From: [email protected] [mailto:[email protected]] On 
Behalf Of Khurram Shahzad
Sent: Thursday, April 16, 2009 12:15 PM
Subject: || Fö©ü§ Öñ ϧläm || Weeping at death of loved one [Hadith]

 

 

A’Hadiths
Guidance from The Prophet (Peace Be Upon Him)

 

Usamah bin Zaid (r.a.) narrated: ‘The daughter of the Messenger of Allah (Peace 
Be Upon Him) sent for him as her child was dying, but the Prophet (Peace Be 
Upon Him) returned the messenger and sent her good wishes saying, "Whatever 
Allah takes away or gives, belongs to Him, and everything with Him has a 
limited fixed term (in this world), and so she should be patient and anticipate 
Allah's reward.'' She again sent for him adjuring him for the sake of Allah to 
come. The Messenger of Allah (Peace Be Upon Him), accompanied with Hadrat Saad 
bin Ubadah, Hadrat Muadh bin Jabal, Hadrat Ubayy bin Kaab, Hadrat Zaid bin 
Thabit and some other companions (r.a.) went to see her. The child was lifted 
up to the Messenger of Allah (Peace Be Upon Him) while his breath was disturbed 
in his chest. On seeing that, the eyes of the Prophet (Peace Be Upon Him) 
streamed with tears. Hadrat Saad (r.a.) commented "O Messenger of Allah (Peace 
Be Upon Him)! What is this?'' The Messenger of Allah (Peace Be Upon Him) 
replied, "It (the tears) are compassion which Allah has placed in the hearts of 
His slaves! Allah is Compassionate only to those among His slaves who are 
compassionate (to others)". 

Related by Al-Bukhari and Muslim.Hadith quoted from Riyad-us-Saliheen (Hadith # 
20)

Commentary:

1.      Gathering of all the relatives is not necessary at the time of 
someone's death. However, their participation in the funeral prayer is Mustahab 
Fard Kifayah (a desirable collective duty upon all Muslims; but which is 
sufficient or equivalent to all having performed it if it is performed by only 
some of them). 
2.      To shed tears on at a loved one’s death, and to exhort the relatives of 
the deceased for patience and accountability are permissible acts. 

Expression of kindness and love is a gift from Allah and means to gain His 
Compassion, while deprivation from it is callousness.




-- 
Fi Aman Allah 

with best wishes and regards
Khurram Shahzad
+92 - 333 - 5127596
Visit: 
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