After missing the grand prize last year by only *that much, I'm thinking of trying again. If there are fewer competitors this year, there is a good chance I can improve my score. If there's more, well, that remains to be seen.
On Tue, 2008-07-08 at 14:44 -0700, [EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote: > In addition to whatever other insanity flourishes at Defcon each > year, the last eight years have been witness to the amazing and > ridiculous contest known as CoffeeWars. This single ludicrous > event is really two contests. The first, and most important, is > the attempt to select the finest coffee from all of hacker culture. > The second is the loopy part: to find the upper limit on how much > coffee the staff can drink. > > Every year, we succeed at the first task. Every year, we fail at > the second. Here is a useful list of key factors contributing to > the outbreak of coffee wars throughout history: > > 1 - because the Kona/JBM debate had to be settled > 2 - because once was not enough > 3 - because we went a little crazy > 4 - because people responded to our brand of crazy > 5 - because it is now an institution > 6 - because we're actually getting good at running it > 7 - because each year the competition gets more intense > 8 - because of popular demand > 9 - because you haven't yet had a chance to test your beans > > What's that, you say? You only recall eight coffee wars? And the > list mentions a ninth? Very attentive of you, dear reader. The > ninth coffee war will take place exactly when you would expect: on > Friday, 8 Aug 2008, at the Riviera, at the opening of the con. > > The rules remain as few and as simple as we can manage: > > A. Whole coffee beans only: nothing ground, powdered, > aerosolized, crystallized, liquified, etc. Just > beans. If you submit something other than beans, > it won't count as an entry. > B. Unflavored beans only: we are trying to evaluate > coffee, not somebody's science experiment. If you > submit flavored coffee (and this includes stuff > with chickory or for that matter any non-coffee > ingredient), it won't' count as an entry. > C. No decaf. Seriously, submitting decaf to Coffee > Wars is like entering your Ford Granada* in the > Indy 500-- it might technically be a car, and maybe > it can actually complete a 500-mile distance, but > it detracts from the whole experience for everyone. > D. Time is critical. A coffee war lasts only a couple > of hours, and it turns out there are limits on the > intake capacity of the judges. If you wish to > enter, you need to get your coffee to us at or > before the opening of the contest area. If you > want to get your coffee back, you need to make a > plan for this when you submit it-- otherwise it > will become part of the CoffeeWars legacy. [secret > message to G Mark: it was agonizing having to turn > away your entry last year solely because of timing] > E. Volume is also important. We need to have enough > coffee beans to brew two pots, plus have some beans > left to pass around for inspection and smelling. 1/2 > lb is a good amount; less than 1/4 lb is probably > not enough. If your coffee is really, really good, > you probably should submit as much as possible... > [secret message to G Mark: come on man, make with > the Kona!] > > Hey, look! In the Defcon contest area! It's CoffeeWars! Grab your > glocks and call the cops. Wait, no. That's what you're supposed to > do when you see Tupac. When you see CoffeeWars, you are supposed to > submit your best coffee beans for judgment, in the hope that you will > be awarded a much-coveted prize, plus 3.5 seconds of loving from the > crowd at the closing ceremony. > > What do you say? Is your coffee good enough to endure the blazing > crucible of CoffeeWars 9? Will you join the previous eight winners > in glory? > > Only one way to find out, friend. So mobilize your beans and enter. > > --Foofus. > > * If you have actually driven a Ford Granada, well, you know what we > mean. > > > -- One of the advantages of being disorderly is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries. A. A. Milne _______________________________________________ Full-Disclosure - We believe in it. Charter: http://lists.grok.org.uk/full-disclosure-charter.html Hosted and sponsored by Secunia - http://secunia.com/
