Funny Jokes - Thanks for the email

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            *   I stopped drinking Coca Cola after I found out that
            it's good for removing toilet stains.

            *   I stopped going to the movies for fear of sitting
            on a needle infected with AIDS.

            *   I smell like a dog since I stopped using deodorants
            because they cause cancer.

            * I don't leave my car in the parking lot or any other
            place and sometimes I even have to walk about 7 blocks
            for fear that someone will drug me with a perfume
            sample and try to rob me.

            *   I also stopped answering the phone for fear that
            they ask me to dial a stupid number and then I get a
            phone bill from hell with calls to Uganda, Singapore
            and Tokyo.

            *   I stopped consuming several foods for fear that the
            estrogens they contain may turn me gay.

            *   I also stopped eating chicken and hamburgers
            because they are nothing other than horrible mutant
            freaks with no eyes or feathers that are bred   in
            a lab so that places like McDonalds can sell their Big
            Macs.

            *   I also stopped drinking anything out of a can for
            fear that I will get sick from the rat feces and
            urine.

            *   I think I'm turning gay because when I go to
            parties, I don't look at any girl no matter how hot
            she is, for fear that she will take my kidneys
            and leave me taking a nap in a   bathtub full of ice.

            *   I also donated all my savings to the Amy Bruce
            account.   A sick girl that was about to die in the
            hospital about 7,000 times.   Funny that girl,
            she's been 7 since 1993...

            * I went bankrupt from bounced checks that I made
            expecting the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL were
            supposed to send me when I participated in their
            special e-mail program.

            *   My Ericcson phone never arrived and neither did the
            passes for a paid vacation to Disneyland.

            *   But I am positive that all this is the cause of a
            stinking chain that I broke or forgot to follow and I
            got a curse from hell.

            IMPORTANT NOTE:   If you don't send this e-mail to at
            least 1200 people in the next 10 seconds, a bird will
            crap on you today at 7pm.









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