A scientist named Walter invented a shrinking ray.

He tried it on himself, and it worked. Unfortunately he couldn't
reverse the process, and he was stuck being the size of a normal
man's thumb.

He had a loyal lab assistant who worked with him, though, so his
diminutive size didn't affect Walter's work too much.

Still, after a while, Walter began to long for female companionship.

His lab assistant thought up a highly unethical plan. He planned to
get a couple of ladies of the night, shrink them down to Walter's
size, and keep them shrunk until they could figure out a way to
reverse the process.

The lab assistant went to Times Square and tried to get the young
ladies, but it was trickier than it seemed. They were reluctant to
travel all the way to the lab, but the lab assistant offered to
double their usual rate, so they finally agreed.

As soon as they stepped into the lab, the assistant turned on the
shrinking ray. There was a flash of light and a puff of smoke, and
when the air had cleared --- the prostitutes were exactly the same
size as they were before.

"What's the big idea? Eek!" One of the prostitutes saw Walter
scurrying across the floor and squashed him flat with her shoe.

Walter was dead, and the experiment was ruined. This was all because
the lab assistant forgot what everyone already knows: ...

... You can lead the whores to Walter, but you can't make 'em shrink.




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