Dad Dan Rather, Cokie Roberts, and a tough old U.S. Marine Gunny were all
captured by terrorists in Iraq.
The leader of the terrorists told them that he would grant them each one last
request before they were beheaded .
Dan Rather said, "Well, I'm a Texan; so I'd like one last bowlful of hot
spicy chili."
The leader nodded to an underling who left and returned with the chili.
Rather ate it all and said, "Now I can die content."
Cokie Roberts said, "I'm a reporter to the end. I want to take out my tape
recorder and describe
the scene here and what's about to happen. Maybe someday someone will hear it
and know
that I was on the job till the end." The leader directed an aide to hand over
the tape recorder
and Roberts dictated some comments. She then said, "Now I can die happy."
The leader turned and said, "And now, Mr. U.S. Marine, what is your final
wish?"
"Kick me in the behind," said the Marine. "What?" asked the leader? "Will
you mock us in your last hour?"
"No, I'm not kidding. I want you to kick me in the behind," insisted the
Marine.
So the leader shoved him into the open, and kicked him in the behind.
The Marine went sprawling, but rolled to his knees, pulled a 9 mm pistol from
inside his cammies, and shot the leader dead.
In the resulting confusion, he leapt to his knapsack, pulled out his M4
carbine and sprayed the Iraqis with gunfire.
In a flash, all the Iraqis were either dead or fleeing for their lives.
As the Marine was untying Rather and Roberts, they asked him, "Why didn't
you just shoot them in the beginning?
Why did you ask them to kick you in the behind first?"
"What," replied the Marine, "and have you butt heads report that I was the
aggressor?
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