Some Very Bright Women 1. I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb... and I also know that I'm not blonde. -Dolly Parton 2. You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy. -Erica Jong 3. I want to have children, but my friends scare me. One of my friends told me she was in labor for 36 hours. I don't even want to do anything that feels good for 36 hours. -Rita Rudner 4. My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. -Rita Rudner 5. I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog. -Wendy Liebman 6. Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth. -Erma Bombeck 7. If high heels were so wonderful, men would still be wearing 'em. -Sue Grafton 8. I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on. -Roseanne Barr 9. I think, therefore I'm single. -Lizz Winstead 10. When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. -Elayne Boosler 11. Behind every successful man is a surprised woman. -Maryon Pearson 12. I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn't itch. -Gilda Radner 13. In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman. -Margaret Thatcher 14. I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career. -Gloria Steinhem 15. Some of us are becoming the men we wanted to marry. -Glori Steinhem 16. I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog which growls every morning, a parrot which swears all afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night. -Marie Corelli 17. Nagging is the repetition of unpalatable truths. -Baroness Edith Summerskill 18. If men can run the world, why can't they stop wearing neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a little noose around your neck? -Linda Ellerbee 19. I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house. -Zsa Zsa Gabor ========== This joke was brought to you by the funnystuff mailing list at http://www.pbbt.com/ . If you would like to subscribe send a message to mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] or visit us on the web at http://www.pbbt.com/mail/ .
[Funnystuff] Some Very Bright Women
PBBT.COM Funnystuff Mailing List Wed, 23 Feb 2000 15:53:40 -0800
