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The Funnystuff Mailing List -- http://www.pbbt.com/funnystuff/today.shtml =======================--------- 4 DVDs for only $0.49 each (plus s&h)! What are you waiting for? Start building your library today with your favorite films. With so many titles to choose from, you�re bound to find some essential titles you just can't live without! Click for more details. http://pbbt.com/jump/1108/super <a href="http://pbbt.com/jump/1108/super";> AOL users click here </a> =======================--------- Quote of the Day: There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men don't think there's a lot they don't know. Women do. Women want to learn. Men think, "I know what I'm doing, just show me somebody naked." - Jerry Seinfeld =======================--------- Aircraft Maintenance Problems and Solutions Never let it be said that ground crews and engineers lack a sense of humor. Here are some actual logged maintenance complaints and problems, known as "squawks," submitted by QUANTAS pilots and the solution recorded by maintenance engineers. By the way Quantas is the only major airline that has never had an accident. P = The problem logged by the pilot. S = The solution and action taken by the engineers. P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement. S: Almost replaced left inside main tire. P: Test flight OK, except autoland very rough. S: Autoland not installed on this aircraft. P: No. 2 propeller seeping prop fluid. S: No. 2 propeller seepage normal. Nos. 1, 3 and 4 propellers lack normal seepage. P: Something loose in cockpit. S: Something tightened in cockpit. P: Dead bugs on windshield. S: Live bugs on backorder. P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200-fpm descent. S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground. P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear. S: Evidence removed. P: DME volume unbelievably loud. S: DME volume set to more believable level. P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick. S: That's what they're there for! P: IFF inoperative. S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode. P: Suspected crack in windscreen. S: Suspect you're right. P: Number 3 engine missing. S: Engine found on right wing after brief search. P: Aircraft handles funny. S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious. P: Target radar hums. S: Reprogrammed target radar with words. P: Mouse in cockpit. S: Cat installed. =======================--------- Join over 2 million Fools who are taking control of their finances! Register for free with The Motley Fool and receive: * Free investment offers * Free 13 Steps to Investing Foolishly guide * Answers to all your financial questions Become a Fool today! Click here: http://pbbt.com/jump/1108/awesome <a href="http://pbbt.com/jump/1108/awesome";> AOL users click here </a> =======================--------- This mailing is NEVER sent without your express permission. Please feel free to forward this email on in it's entirety. To subscribe: http://www.pbbt.com/funnystuff/ [EMAIL PROTECTED] To unsubscribe: Click the link at the bottom of this message, or [EMAIL PROTECTED] To send feedback: [EMAIL PROTECTED] Advertising: We are always looking for quality advertisers for the pbbt.com website and this mailing list. Please email mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] for rates and sales information. 25% discount* if you mention funnystuff. This joke was brought to you by the funnystuff mailing list. Get today's joke on the web @ http://www.pbbt.com/funnystuff/today.shtml ============================================================ Apply Now for a new Discover� Platinum - 0% Intro APR on Purchases and Balance Transfers* plus, No Annual Fee. 100% Fraud Protection, Up to 2% Cash Back Bonus� award*, Up to $50,000 Credit Limit, and more! Act before November 30! http://click.topica.com/caaad4Hb1dhsSb1uOHTf/Discover ============================================================ ==^================================================================ This email was sent to: [email protected] EASY UNSUBSCRIBE click here: http://topica.com/u/?b1dhsS.b1uOHT Or send an email to: [EMAIL PROTECTED] T O P I C A -- Register now to manage your mail! http://www.topica.com/partner/tag02/register ==^================================================================
