I was talking to a guy the other day who asked me if I had found Jesus.  So
I asked him how he found homosexuality.    He exclaimed that it was an
abomination and so I said:  "Says who?"   and he said, says Jesus and I
said, where?      Well not Jesus but Leviticus and I said that I was fine
since I didn't charge interest on any loans I made and never played football
although I did once have a pigskin cowboy hat but no one had taught me any
different and I got rid of it when I learned it made me have unclean
thoughts.    

 

I always wondered, being of a scientific inclination, whether it was the
pork or the beef herder that gave me the thoughts?    At the end of the 19th
century, being an interest charging banker was a capital sin according to
the revival minister's interpretation of the bible of the day.   Then they
decided to make peace with Usury.    I don't really get their logic given
the story of the banker and the widow that Jesus DID say however, it must be
true since  the late Jerry Falwell served on bank boards.     They also
stopped hanging people for riding on the Sabbath as well.     The Catholics
were modern much sooner having given up the capital sin of Usury when they
created an order of soldiers (Knights Templar) to harass the middle east and
needed money to fund their Christian manly rites of war over the Holy
Domains. 

 

Since I don't enjoy those manly "Templar" movies I've decided to move on and
now eat pork deliciously,  I had a BLT this afternoon,  and accept most of
my rebellious thoughts although I still feel guilty around footballs unless
they are made out of heathen rubber.    Do they use rubber or the skin of a
pig in Texas?      Thank God they don't demand, like the Cherokees, that the
ball be made from the skins of fast squirrels.     That would have changed
the ecology of Central Park forever.       But gay?   I'm fine with gay,
since God made them that way.   I wonder who made pigs and shellfish and why
it's still alright to sell my daughter into slavery   Ex. 21:7 since
everything in the book is still true as the manual for all human's behavior,
give or take minus or plus one or two.

 

Uncle REH

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