Sorry, but I like Phil's ideas better. There's no need to damage perfectly innocent walls. Heh heh heh.
---
Shepherds are the best beasts.
----- Original Message ----- From: "Ryan Strunk" <ryan.str...@gmail.com>
To: "'Gamers Discussion list'" <gamers@audyssey.org>
Sent: Monday, August 17, 2009 7:34 AM
Subject: Re: [Audyssey] Top ten ways to get mainstream game accessibility


Some of Phil's suggestions sounded very serious; some of them, I hope, were supposed to be jokes. With that in mind I propose my own step-by-step guide
for making mainstream games accessible in the current environment/market.
Feel free to take it as seriously as you like, and definitely send
audio/video.

1. Locate a large concrete/brick wall. This may be the side of a commercial
building or it may be a retaining wall. The Russian stage from Street
Fighter II is also acceptable. Don't think too hard about it, as rather than
location, the wall is the important part.

2. before carrying on with the plan, insure that your head is entirely free
from cover. The more zealous of you may wish to shave your scalp to insure
maximum ... um ... impact. Feel free to be artistic! You may be inspired to
tattoo your skull with phrases such as "1up for accessibility" or "Game
inaccessibility? FATALITY!" If you must wear a head covering, the only
permissible article is Mario's red hat.

3. Stand several feet back from the wall in question. If you are athletic,
you may wish to give yourself more running room.

4. Approach the wall at a high rate of speed, making sure to lower your head
as you reach your destination. It is important to note that no effort must
be made to halt your progress before a collision occurs. Again, feel free to
be artistic. Scream the theme to Mario Brothers as you approach. Make the
sound of Sonic the hedgehog powering up for his sprint. Perform a Megaman
style slide into the wall.

5. Repeat until you are convinced you have made mainstream games accessible.
You are permitted to use as many continues as you deem appropriate.

Good luck to everyone out there!

Ryan


----- Original Message ----- From: "Phil Vlasak" <p...@pcsgames.net>
To: "Gamers Discussion list" <gamers@audyssey.org>
Sent: Sunday, August 16, 2009 6:25 PM
Subject: [Audyssey] Top ten ways to get mainstream game accessibility


Top ten ways to get mainstream game accessibility
10. Organize all the guide dog owners in the country to visit mainstream
game company headquarters and have their dogs poop on the floor.
9. Kidnap the children of mainstream game company  executives and hold
them ransom until their games are Accessible.
8. Picket mainstream game company  headquarters with Braille signs saying
that they are discriminating to the blind.
7. Have every blind person in the world learn computer programming and
require them to debug a line of game code before they can read an audio
book.
6. Start a charity, National Association of Accessible Games, and get
people to donate millions of dollars, then hire sighted programmers to
develop accessible games.
5. Get all colleges to add a class of Accessible game development to all
computer programming courses.
4. Get the NFB and ACB to protest that there are not enough mainstream
game accessibility.
3. Petition Stevie Wonder to be the spokesperson for mainstream game
accessibility.
2. Get all blind people to send a dollar to Thomas Ward so he can finish
his accessible game engine.

And the top way to get mainstream game accessibility,
Visit the homes of mainstream game company executives and poke their eyes

out.




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