Hi guys, my nephew finished 'drop' C-17 training in OK and is almost in Baton Rouge. He's going to try to get a ticket. If anyone knows of any, can you please call Brett Troutman at 904.613.5068 <#>. Does anyone know where the Gator Clubs are staying? Should he just aim to stay in New Orleans? This is a last-minute thing so he couldn't make advance plans. Any help/suggestions are appreciated. Thanks so much, Terri GOOOOOO Gators!
On Friday, October 11, 2013 10:35:44 AM UTC-4, John Vega wrote: > A few years back, an Auburn fan who goes by the Rivals username > "DeepBlue" posted this controversial dissertation about LSU fans. It has > become legend ever since. > > *** > > LSU fans smell just like corn dogs. > > Yes, it is often said, but so, so true. > > LSU fans do smell like corn dogs. > > I would never tell them that to their face though. This is something > better said at Internet distances. Even now, I am afraid. > > I am afraid that they'll know I said it. I'll walk past an LSU fan > someday, and he'll see that look in my eye that gives it away. That look > that says, "gee, what is that smell? Is it corn dogs?" The next thing you > know, I'll have flat tires on my car. > > If you only learn one thing from me today, remember not to tell LSU fans > how they smell - you know, like corn dogs. > > LSU fans seem, somehow, sensitive to that whole corn dog issue. > > I think this may be why a lot of fans get beaten up by LSU fans. If you > attend a game in Baton Rouge, try to avoid telling them that they smell > like corn dogs. Say something else instead. Like, "Wow, LSU sure does have > a great team this year. This is going to be a great SEC game." > > It's hard. I know. It's like when you're having sex and you try to think > about baseball. That corn dog smell is just so overwhelming. It makes it > hard for you to think about football or baseball or whatever else. Your > brain wanders into corn dog topics like: "Gee, I wonder if I took a bite of > your finger, if you would taste just like a corn dog?"; or "Is this a real > person or is it a giant corn dog trying to make me think it is a real > person?" or "What did that giant corn dog just say?" or "Excuse me, Mister, > why is it that you smell just exactly like corn dogs smell?" or, of course, > after a silencer: "Madam, did you just let the corn dogs out?" > > Heck, after what I've heard about LSU fans, I think it may be better not > to smell them at all. Okay, not all of them. Some of them are nice. Sure. > Smell the nice ones. That's okay. > > You know what else is a bad thing to do? Holding your nose around them. > They are real sensitive to that, too. Try holding your breath. But don't be > obvious about it. Somehow they know you're trying not to breathe in the > corn dog smell. And that offends them. They'll likely punch you for that if > they catch on to what you're doing. > > If you do breathe it in long enough, though, it'll permeate your whole > body, and then you'll smell like a corn dog just like they do. But don't > say, "Dang, now I smell like a corn dog." They take offense to that. And > they will throw things. But not corn dogs. Hard stuff. Stuff that leaves > bruises and makes you bleed. Then you may have to get stitches or > something. Just don't say it. If you do start smelling like a corn dog, > just shut up about it. Okay? > > I think kids are acutely aware of corn dog smells too. Counsel your kids > on how to behave around LSU fans. If LSU fans are driving around town, do > not let your kids stick their heads out of your car window and sniff the > air. No. Keep your windows rolled up. An odd change in their expression - > indicating they smell corn dogs - might get a wrench or pipe or some other > object tossed at your windshield. So, that's dangerous. Let your kids stick > their heads out of the car windows as you drive - on some other weekend > > I know you are just as puzzled as I am about some of this corn dog stuff. > What puzzles me most is that I've never actually seen any of these LSU fans > with a corn dog in their hand. Okay, maybe there's no mystery there - maybe > they already ate the corn dogs. Who knows? Maybe there's a corn dog factory > in Baton Rouge and they all work there. Maybe, there's a corn dog lotion > that they wear, or a French perfume. Maybe their city council puts corn dog > juice in the water supply - kind of like fluoride. The politics there are > probably weird. The big political issue during the city election is whether > they should add more ketchup or more mustard to the water. Don't comment on > it though. It's not politically correct over there. It's like a > malnutrition issue or something. It's like the corn dogs are probably added > to the water to prevent starvation or something. > > I know when you go to Baton Rouge, you're thinking: "Ahhhh. Here I am in > Baton Rouge, Louisiana. I'll bet the people here smell just like boiled > crawfish or shrimp etoufe' or some fancy Cajun food." But just stop > thinking that. That's just a myth. They smell just like corn dogs. > > In fact, please listen to my advice. Leave them alone about the corn dog > odor. And don't try masking the odor with something stronger. They'll curse > at you. They'll say something like: "WTF, how dare you smoke a cigar in my > home," or "WTF!! Are you too good for the smell of corn dogs?" and they'll > cuss out your kids too: "WTF!!! Little Mister fancy pants over here acts > like he doesn't want to smell like corn dogs." > > Cajuns are not like us. Don't you see that, yet? They are really sensitive > about being sniffed and about their corn dog aroma. They know they smell > like corn dogs and it is no laughing matter to them at all. I know, I know. > We sniff the Bammers and the UGA dawgs and the Ole messes, and we keep a > straight face with each of them, but don't press your luck with the Cajun > tiger fans. Don't refer to Death Valley as corn dog valley either. I mean > that's just wrong. Even if you've been drinking, they'll beat you up and > curse out your kids. > > Along these lines, be extra careful when you laugh in their direction - > even if you're laughing about something else. Like baseball or football, or > sex or whatever. If you can't control yourself and you must laugh though, > do not snort. The snorting makes them think that you smell their corn dog > body odor from a distance or that you're choking on it or something. > They'll likely burn your van for that. We lost a campus building over just > one snort. > > So, just remember. You can love one another without sniffing each other. > You can enjoy the clash of a couple of good football teams. You can enjoy > the thrill of the rivalry. But after the game, please heed my words. Please > just move along. No sniffing the opposing fans this Saturday. Okay? Get > your corn dog jollies at home. > > Enough with this corn dog talk. Let's play ball... > -- -- GATORS: ONE VOICE ON SATURDAY - NO VOICE ON SUNDAY! 1996 National Football Champions | 2006 National Basketball Champions 2006 National Football Champions | 2007 National Basketball Champions 2008 National Football Champions | Three Heisman Trophy winners: Steve Spurrier (1966), Danny Wuerffel (1996), Tim Tebow (2007) - Visit our website at www.gatornet.us --- You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google Groups "GatorTalk" group. To unsubscribe from this group and stop receiving emails from it, send an email to [email protected]. 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