Joel, Thanks for review and comments. See inline...
The revised version will be uploaded if you are ok with the resolutions. Regards, Dong -----Original Message----- From: Joel M. Halpern [mailto:[email protected]] Sent: Monday, August 03, 2009 6:32 PM To: Mary Barnes; General Area Review Team; [email protected] Cc: [email protected] Subject: [Gen-art] review: draft-ietf-dime-diameter-qos-10.txt I have been selected as the General Area Review Team (Gen-ART) reviewer for this draft (for background on Gen-ART, please see http://www.alvestrand.no/ietf/gen/art/gen-art-FAQ.html). Please resolve these comments along with any other Last Call comments you may receive. Document: draft-ietf-dime-diameter-qos-10.txt Diameter Quality of Service Application Reviewer: Joel M. Halpern Review Date: 3-August-2009 IETF LC End Date: 4-August-2009 IESG Telechat date: N/A Summary: This document is almost ready for publication as a Proposed Standard Minor issues: If I am understanding the message flows in section 4.2.1 and 4.2.2 properly, the QAR which serves as a notification that QoS service is taking place (rather than as a request for authorization) uses "START" as a special indicator of this difference in usage. I can not determine what this "START" indication actually is. When I look at the ABNF in section 5.1 for the QAR, I can not determine where this indication would go. >> The QAR is used to send a trigger for the authorization process in the >> Diameter QoS Server (DQS). The NE will not perform the QoS service (resource >> reservation/allocation) until receiving the QAA with authorization >> result/permission from DQS server. The START mainly refers to a separate accounting session, it is decoupled from QoS authorization session. I think we could remove the related call flows for accounting from the diagram. Any objection? In a related question, is there a reason that the data flows in section 9 do not show this QAR(START...) message? >> it is not part of QoS authorization process. See resolution above. Nits/editorial comments: Section 4.2.2 suggests that the AE may be able to dynamically discover the correct NE which is to be the target of a push operation to push out QoS authentication information. It then points to section 4.2.3. Section 4.2.3 points to the Diameter base specification, which as far as I understand it, would not have any way to provide for a Diameter server to discover a diameter client. I realize that this is a hard problem, and that in reality various heuristics or configuration are used. The text appears to lead the reader into a wild goose chase looking for the magic answer. I am not sure what correction could or should be applied, because I can not guess the assumptions being made in regard to the problem of push target selection. If the assumption is that the push target is a DIME client associated in some way with the affected user, that could be usefully stated. >> The dynamic discovery refers to the peer discovery described in section 5.2 >> of RFC 3588. Then it uses the selection criteria to nail down the related >> Diameter cilent that has a relationship with the affected user. The >> clarification is added as follow: - section 4.2.3, a) "... or dynamic discovery as described in section 5.2 of [RFC3588]"; b) "the Diameter QoS application node selects and retrieves the location information of the peer node that is associated with the affected user based on some .." I think there is a typo in the second paragraph of section 6.1. The text reads "The following states are supplemented to the state machine on the client ...:" I am pretty sure that for this paragraph it should read "...the state machine on the server..." The header reads "SERVER, STATEFUL", and the events are events seen at the server and the actions are server actions. The paragraph after the table, and the following table, are really about and for the client. >> good catch. Corrected. In a related question, is there no change in server state when either the initial QAA or that "START" QAA are received? (Or are these only related to accounting state, which is not covered in this document?) >> QAA is sent by Diameter QoS server towards client. Not sure what you mean? >> Do you actually say 'QAR'? If the case, there is no change from state >> machine specified by existing RFCs e.g. RFC 3588/4005. _______________________________________________ Gen-art mailing list [email protected] https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/gen-art
