Francis,
Thanks for the detailed review. We are currently
working on the DISCUSSes of the IESG. We will post a
revised draft shortly.
Glenn
(2011/06/19 8:07), Francis Dupont wrote:
> I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. For background on
> Gen-ART, please see the FAQ at
> <http://wiki.tools.ietf.org/area/gen/trac/wiki/GenArtfaq>.
>
> Please resolve these comments along with any other Last Call comments
> you may receive.
>
> Document: draft-ietf-netlmm-pmipv6-mib-05.txt
> Reviewer: Francis Dupont
> Review Date: 20110527
> IETF LC End Date: 20110512
> IESG Telechat date: unknown
>
> Summary: Ready
>
> Major issues: None
>
> Minor issues: None
>
> Nits/editorial comments:
> - Toc page 2 and 9 page 67: Acknowledgements -> Acknowledgments
>
> - 5 page 7: incoherent zip/country order for Japan
>
> - 5 page 9: pmip6Stats:pmip6BindingRegcounters ->
> ^
> pmip6Stats:pmip6BindingRegcounters
> (fortunately it is in a comment, but an ASN.1 comment :-)
>
> - 5 page 16: reindent pmip6MagProxyCOATable description
> (same pages 39 and 40 for pmip6LmaMinDelayBeforeBCEDelete)
>
> - 5 page 22 (pmip6MagBLlMnIdentifier): bad wording (the two is for
> the length, not the value).
> same page 28 for pmip6BindingMnLlIdentifier
>
> - 5 page 24: reformat pmip6MagBLAccessTechnologyType description
>
> - 5 page 24 (pmip6MagBLTimeRecentlyAccepted):
> acknowledgement -> acknowledgment
> (same page 29 for pmip6BindingMagLinkLocalAddress,
> page 30 for pmip6MissingMnIdentifierOption,
> page 31 for pmip6NotLMAForThisMobileNode, etc)
>
> - 5 page 31 (pmip6MissingMnIdentifierOption): router. -> router,
>
> - 5 page 37 (pmip6CounterDiscontinuityTime): viz. ???
>
> - 5 page 41 (pmip6LmaTimestampValidityWindow): bad wording:
> length of time ???
>
> - 5 page 50 (pmip6CoreReadOnlyCompliance): missing final '.' in
> description
>
> - 6 page 63: extra space in 'pmip6MobileNodeGeneratedTimestampInUse :'
>
> - 6 page 63: IPSec -> IPsec
>
> - 10 page 67: presentation should be uniformized.
>
> Regards
>
> [email protected]
>
> PS: I don't remember if I sent this review, so anyway I resend it.
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