Hi Francis,
Thanks for the careful review. We have amended all the editorial comments
in the updating draft. Thanks.
BR
Yunfei
zhangyunfei
From: Francis Dupont
Date: 2011-11-28 22:58
To: gen-art
CC: draft-ietf-ppsp-problem-statement.all
Subject: review of draft-ietf-ppsp-problem-statement-07.txt
I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. For background on
Gen-ART, please see the FAQ at
<http://wiki.tools.ietf.org/area/gen/trac/wiki/GenArtfaq>.
Please resolve these comments along with any other Last Call comments
you may receive.
Document: draft-ietf-ppsp-problem-statement-07.txt
Reviewer: Francis Dupont
Review Date: 20111124
IETF LC End Date: 20111130
IESG Telechat date: unknown
Summary: Ready
Major issues: None
Minor issues: None (at the exception of the space character isuse)
Nits/editorial comments:
First there is a real issue with the space character (a zillion of them
are mssing in place they are required) in the document. I'll put a list
in PS...
- Header page 1: seng -> Seng
- 1 page 4: .. -> . or ...
- 1 page 4: open, standard -> open standard (or standard, open if
'open standard' is not the intended meaning)
- 1 page 4: Multiple, similar -> Multiple similar
- 1 page 4: in theory the CDN abbrev should be introduced
- 1 page 5: and streaming control -> streaming control
- 2 page 6: e.g. -> e.g.,
- 3.2 page 9 and 5.2 page 15: 3rd -> third
- 3.3 page 9: for fixed Internet -> for the fixed Internet
and to fixed Internet -> to the fixed Internet
- 3.3 page 10: In the mobile networks -> In mobile networks
- 3.3 pahe 10: Third, mobility issue. -> Third, mobility issue:
- 3.4 page 10: settop boxes -> set-top boxes
- 5.1 page 14: I don't like the term normalized
- 5.3 page 16: setbox -> set-top box (or STB?)
- 5.3 page 16 figure 4: STB -> set-top box (BTW there is enough place!)
- 5.4 page 17: I can't understand the difference between super-nodes
and super-peers
- 5.4 page 17: as the peer in this section are phones and there is no
phone-phone protocol for not technical reasons, of course there is
no use case for the peer-peer protocol.
- 5.5 page 17: When -> when
- 5.5 page 17: in "To do this, it requests..." I don't know what is the
"it" so I can't understand the paragraph (BTW cache nodes are in plural
so they can be "they", not "it")
- 5.5 page 17: needn't -> do not need
Regards
[email protected]
PS: missing spaces:
- Header: between initial and name, at the exception of the first author
- Abstract: Peer_(P2P and Protocol_(PPSP)
- Toc page 3 and 4 page 11: PPSP:_Standard
- 1 page 4:
* 2014_[Cisco]
* PPstream [PPStream],_UUSee [UUSee]_and CNTV_[CNTV]
* (e.g.,_AkamaiNetSession [Akamai], ChinaCache_[ChinaCache])
- 3.1 page 8: points._P2P
- 3.2 page 8: vastly_the
- 3.2 page 9:
* UUSee_[UUSee],
* RayV_[RayV] and Forcetech_[Forcetech].
* [RFC 5693]._However,
* providers._On
- 3.3 page 9: transmission_(esp. (BTW esp. -> especially)
- 3.3 page 10: which_may
- 4 page 11: peer-list_(potentially
- 4 page 12: Figure 1._The
- 5.3 page 16: With PPSP,_peers
- 5.4 page 17 (extra space): P2Pstreaming ) is -> P2Pstreaming) is
- 9 pages 22 and 23:
* [VoD] Yan Huang et al,_Challenges,
* applications,_http://labs.adobe.com/technologies/cirrus/
* Communications of the ACM,_Vol. 53,_No. 10, Pages 72-82.
* Yong Liu et al,_"A survey
* Applications,_Volume 1,
* Number 1,_18-28,_Springer,_2008.
* H. Jiang et al,_"Efficient
* distribution services,_http://www.3gpp...
* Network,_Jeonghun Noh et al,_MOBIMEDIA '09.
* J. Peltotaloet al.,_"A real-time
* (misplaced) Y. Huang et al,_"Challenges,
* Communication Review,_38(4):375-388, 2008.
_______________________________________________
Gen-art mailing list
[email protected]
https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/gen-art
