Hi Meral, Thanks for your review. See below:
On Tue, Jun 19, 2012 at 11:51 AM, Meral Shirazipour <[email protected]> wrote: > I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for > draft-ietf-trill-clear-correct-03.txt. For background on Gen-ART, please see > the FAQ at <http://www.alvestrand.no/ietf/gen/art/gen-art-FAQ.html>. > > Please resolve these comments along with any other Last Call comments you > may receive. > > > Document: draft-ietf-trill-clear-correct-03 > Reviewer: Meral Shirazipour > Review Date: June-18-2012 > IETF LC End Date: June-20-2012 > IESG Telechat date: June-21-2012 > > > Summary: > The document is ready for publication as a standards track RFC, however I > have a few comments. > > > > Minor issues: > > TRILL-PORT-VER sub-TLV should be "PORT-TRILL-VER" sub-TLV.(there are a few > occurrences) > > Nits/editorial comments: > > - Suggestion: [Page 6], line 2, spell out first occurrence LSP > > > > - Suggestion: [Page 6], line 5, "overload bit on" ----> "overload bit set" > > > > - Clarification:[Page 6], Section 2.1, line 5, add a comma "," after > "traffic engineered frames" > > > > - Typo:[Page 6], last word, "contain" --missing s--> "contains" > > > > - Suggestion: [Page 7], Section 2.2, line 2, spell out first occurrence of > "Reverse Path Forwarding Check" and then use "RPFC" in the rest of the > document. > > > > - Clarification:[Page 10], Section 2.4.2.3, line 5, sentence starting with > "RB2 MUST advertise ...": we could omit the second occurrence of "it might > use" in that sentence. > > > > - Clarification:[Page 10], Section 2.4.2.3, 3rd line from last, "end > stations connected to RB": "a RB" or "RBs"? > > > > - Typo: [Page 11], Section 3.1,"( j, k)" --remove extra space--> "(j, k)" > > > > - Suggestion: [Page 11], Section 3.2, "already in flight" ----> "already in > transmission" > > > > - Typo [Page 12]:"many multi-destination frame"--missing s--> "many > multi-destination frames" > > > > - Clarification:[Page 13], Point 4. , Sentence 2: suggested clarification: > > "It does so by checking LSPs it receives and updating its link state > database for any of its nicknames held with higher priority by another TRILL > Switch that is IS-IS reachable." > > > > - Typo [Page 14]:"unicast Channel message"--missing s-->"unicast Channel > messages" > > > > - Typo [Page 16]: Section 5.2,"Routeing" ----> "Routing" > > > > - Suggestion:[Page 16],last sentence, suggestion: "This safety margin is > called "Margin" below." > > > > - Typo [Page 18]:"a specified in [RFC6325]"--missing s-->"as specified in > [RFC6325]" > > > > - Suggestion: [Page 19], spell out first occurrence of EISS > > > > - Suggestion:[Page 21], Point 1, not clear what the new text becomes. > Suggestion: refer to last paragraph of section 3.1 instead of paragraph > before 3.2, and propose the new sentence. > > > > - Clarification:[Page 21], Point 2, it is not clear what the change is to > section 3.2 of RFC6327. > > > > - Clarification:[Page 21], Point 3, it would be clearer to say "bullet A9 is > added" (if this is an event like the rest of the bullets in section 3.3 of > RFC6327) > > > > - Clarification:[Page 22], section 10.1,"disagreement over the Designated > VLAN or the like". Suggestion: replace the term "or the like" with other > examples or remove the term. > > > > -Typo: [Page 22], section 10.1, "each others frames"---->"each other's > frames" > > > > -Typo: [Page 24], "DRB SHOULD NOT appointed"---->"DRB SHOULD NOT appoint", > "an VLAN"---->"a VLAN", "RBridged"---->"RBridge" > > > > -Clarification:[Page 25], Section 11, Point 1, "The previously reserved", > reference to document. > > > > - Clarification: [page 19/page 27], Informative References, reference [802], > to verify which standard we want to refer to for Canonical Format Indicator: > > If it is "IEEE Std 802-2001: IEEE Standard for Local and Metropolitan Area > Networks: Overview and Architecture", then the date should be 7 February > 2001." > > However this specific document does not define CIF. You may want to refer to > 802.1Q-2005. Thanks, Donald ============================= Donald E. Eastlake 3rd +1-508-333-2270 (cell) 155 Beaver Street, Milford, MA 01757 USA [email protected] > Thanks, > Meral > > > --- > Meral Shirazipour > Ericsson > Research > www.ericsson.com _______________________________________________ Gen-art mailing list [email protected] https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/gen-art
