Peter, thanks for your review. Ben, thanks for following up. I have entered a 
No Objection ballot.

Alissa

> On Oct 10, 2018, at 6:11 AM, Ben Campbell <[email protected]> wrote:
> 
> 
> 
>> On Oct 9, 2018, at 10:50 PM, Peter Yee <[email protected]> wrote:
>> 
>> Ben,
>> 
>>      Regarding the metadata, it would seem to that these intermediaries 
>> would be inserting this metadata regardless of whether S/MIME was used or 
>> not.  As the intermediaries can't read the S/MIME messages (assuming 
>> encryption), they aren't revealing anything that the sender could have 
>> protected more than is done with S/MIME over the message content.  If 
>> there's a case where S/MIME induces the addition of metadata that would not 
>> be otherwise attached, then I could see a problem.  It's just not clear to 
>> me from the text given that this is the case.
> 
> Hi Peter,
> 
> The issue isn’t that S/MIME enables this; it’s that it doesn’t protect 
> against it. The sender could go to great effort to encrypt their data so that 
> only the receiver can read it, and find that the “network” adds it back in 
> cleartext.
> 
> This can happen whether or not S/MIME encryption is used, but one assumes the 
> sender uses it with an expectation of privacy.
> 
> Would it help to add something to the effect  of “The use of S/MIME 
> encryption will not prevent privacy leaks introduced by header enrichment.” 
> to the beginning of the paragraph?
> 
>> 
>>      One more potential nit: Page 22, Section 12, 4th paragraph, 4th 
>> sentence: verify that you really want UAS (i.e., User Agent Server) in that 
>> sentence.  I'm not familiar enough with the context to know if you didn't 
>> really mean UAs (User Agents) as was used in the previous sentence.
> 
> You are correct, it should be UAs. Good catch.
> 
> Thanks!
> 
> Ben.
> 
>> 
>>      Thanks for considering my input.
>> 
>>              -Peter
>> 
>> -----Original Message-----
>> From: Ben Campbell [mailto:[email protected]]
>> Sent: Tuesday, October 09, 2018 9:55 AM
>> To: Peter Yee
>> Cc: [email protected]; [email protected]; 
>> [email protected]
>> Subject: Re: Genart last call review of draft-campbell-sip-messaging-smime-03
>> 
>> Hi Peter, thanks for your review. Please see inline:
>> 
>> Ben.
>> 
>>> On Oct 8, 2018, at 9:57 PM, Peter Yee <[email protected]> wrote:
>>> 
>>> Reviewer: Peter Yee
>>> Review result: Ready with Nits
>>> 
>>> I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area
>>> Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed by
>>> the IESG for the IETF Chair.  Please treat these comments just like
>>> any other last call comments.
>>> 
>>> For more information, please see the FAQ at
>>> 
>>> <https://trac.ietf.org/trac/gen/wiki/GenArtfaq>.
>>> 
>>> Document: draft-campbell-sip-messaging-smime-03
>>> Reviewer: Peter Yee
>>> Review Date: 2018-10-08
>>> IETF LC End Date: 2018-10-10
>>> IESG Telechat date: 2018-10-25
>>> 
>>> Summary:  This draft updates and clarifies the use of S/MIME with SIP
>>> and MSRP to provide end-to-end message protection.  A few nits should
>>> be corrected and there are a couple of requests listed as minor
>>> issues, but those can be safely ignored.  [Ready with nits]
>>> 
>>> Major issues: None
>>> 
>>> Minor issues:
>>> 
>>> Section 10/Appendix A:  It would be good to supply the private keys
>>> used for signing and encryption in the example messages so that
>>> implementers can test the correctness of their implementations against
>>> the RFC.  As it stands, the examples mostly serve to show format.
>> 
>> The purpose was in fact to show format. We did not mean these to be test 
>> vectors, and I don’t think this draft is the right place for that. At best, 
>> we would be showing the output of a particular version of OpenSSL.
>> 
>>> 
>>> Page 22, 2nd full paragraph, 2nd sentence: mention is made of
>>> information that would have otherwise been encrypted.  It's not clear
>>> how use of S/MIME is inducing that information to be sent in the clear 
>>> rather than encrypted.
>>> Perhaps a brief explanation would help rather than relying on "certain 
>>> cases”.
>> 
>> The point is that the the intermediaries insert cleartext metadata that 
>> includes information that the sending client might have preferred to be 
>> encrypted.
>> 
>> How about the following:
>> 
>> OLD:
>>  Certain messaging services, for example those based on CPM and RCS,
>>  may include intermediaries that attach metadata to user generated
>>  messages.  In certain cases this metadata may reveal information to
>>  third parties that would have otherwise been encrypted.  Implementors
>>  and operators should consider whether this metadata may create
>>  privacy leaks.  Such an analysis is beyond the scope of this
>>  document.
>> 
>> NEW:
>>  Certain messaging services, for example those based on CPM and RCS,
>>  may include intermediaries that attach metadata to user generated
>>  messages.  In some cases this metadata may include information
>>  that the sender might have preferred not to send in clear
>>  text. Operators should consider whether this metadata may create
>>  privacy leaks.  Such an analysis is beyond the scope of this
>>  document.
>> 
>>> 
>> 
>>> Nits/editorial comments:
>> 
>> I will fix the editorial issues, save one on which I have commented below:
>> 
>>> 
>>> Page 1, header: remove "RFC" in three places in the "Updates" header.
>>> (Run idnits nad read through the output.  There's more.)
>>> 
>>> Page 3, Section 1, 5th paragraph, last sentence: append a comma after
>>> "RFC 3428".
>>> 
>>> Page 4, Section 3, 1st paragraph, 1st sentence: change "SIP based" to
>>> "SIP-based".
>>> 
>>> Page 4, Section 3, 4th paragraph, delete an extraneous space before 
>>> "already".
>>> 
>>> Page 5, 1st paragraph, 1st sentence: change "send" to "sent".
>>> 
>>> Page 5, 2nd paragraph: append "to" after "intended".
>>> 
>>> Page 7, 2nd paragraph after "id-aes128-CBC", 1st sentence: append
>>> algorithm after "AES-128-WRAP" *or* change "AES-128-WRAP" to "AES-128
>>> wrap" as given in RFC 3565.
>>> 
>>> Page 7, 3rd paragraph after id-aes128-wrap, 2nd sentence: append "algorithm"
>>> after (ECDH).  Do something similar for the next two sentences.
>>> 
>>> Page 7, Secion 4.3, 1st sentence: expand UAC here on first use.
>>> 
>>> Page 8, section 4.4.1, 1st paragraph: insert "as" before "a SIP URI".
>>> 
>>> Page 9, 6th paragraph: change "received" to "receive".
>>> 
>>> Page 9, 8th paragraph: change "out of band" to "out-of-band".
>>> 
>>> Page 10, Section 7.3, 1st paragraph, last sentence: insert a double
>>> quote before "Unsupported".
>>> 
>>> Page 12, Section 8.3, 3rd paragraph, 2nd to last sentence: change
>>> "s/mime" to "S/MIME".
>>> 
>>> Page 13, Section 8.4, 2nd paragraph, 2nd sentence: change "answer" to
>>> "answerer".
>>> 
>>> Page 13, Section 8.4, 2nd paragraph, 3rd sentence: delete duplicated "the".
>>> 
>>> Page 13, Section 8.5, 1st paragraph, 2nd sentence: delete duplicated 
>>> "since".
>>> 
>>> Page 14, 1st full paragraph, last sentence: change "Intant" to "Instant".
>>> 
>>> Page 14, Section 9.2, 1st sentence: append a space after "mechanism".
>>> 
>>> Page 15, Section 10, 1st paragraph, 3rd sentence: join "over" and "running"
>>> into a single word.
>>> 
>>> Page 15, Section 10, 2nd paragraph: if you wish to be historically
>>> correct, insert "Mr." before "Watson".  That would, however, cause a
>>> painful exercise in regenerating the examples, so feel free to ignore this 
>>> suggestion.
>> 
>> We will fix this if we find other reasons to regenerate the example, but 
>> otherwise we will exercise the option to ignore for the reason you mentioned 
>> :-)
>> 
>>> 
>>> Page 15, section 10.1, 1st paragraph, 2nd sentence: change "a" to "an"
>>> unless "smime" is not pronounced "ess-mime".
>>> 
>>> Page 22, 1st partial paragraph, last sentence: change "vulnerabile" to
>>> "vulnerable".
>>> 
>> 
>> 
>> 
> 
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