I don't know where this came from, but one of my friends shipped it to
me. It's at least worth a chuckle.
---
We at Carnival Cruise Lines didn't forget that a lot of entertainers
had promised to leave the country if George W. Bush were to be
re-elected President.
With that in mind, we have a Special Offer for those who still want
to keep their promise!
Attention: Would Alec Baldwin, Rosie O'Donnell and her wife, Ed
Asner, Jeanane Garafalo, Whoppi Goldberg, Al Franken, Michael Moore,
Cher, Phil Donahue, Rob Reiner (apparently still a "meathead"),
Barbara Streisand, Jane Fonda, Pierre Salinger, as well as the entire
staffs of the LA and NY Times and anyone else who made that promise,
please dispose of all US assets and report to Florida for the sailing
of the Funship Cruise, "Elation" which has been commissioned to take
you to your new vacation homes in Afghanistan.
You may opt to be dropped off in Somalia or Iraq.
The Florida Supreme Court will sponsor a Farewell Parade in your
honor through Palm Beach, Broward, and Miami-Dade counties prior to
your cruise.
Please pack for an extended stay... at least four more years.
Note: Since you advocate strict gun control, you may not bring any.
Staffing your voyage is Bill Clinton as captain, Al Gore as cruise
director, Grey Davis, Purser Terry Heinz Kerry hopefully will be kept
somewhere below decks away from the media.
Monica Lewinsky as the "Cigar and Cigarette Girl",
Entertainment by the Dixie Chicks and Bruce Springsteen, John Kerry
will be our Life Guard in consideration of his past experience in
pulling people out of the water (Unless he decides at the last minute
not to go). He is advocating the elimination of the game
"shuffleboard" in favor of his new game he calls "waffleboard" Be
sure to pack your flip flops as you will need them while playing!
Ted Kennedy will double as Bartender and Director of Emergency Procedures
Rev. Al Sharpton will provide inspirational services, and
Ex-Congressman Gary Condit as intern coordinator.
If you have any questions about making arrangements for your homes,
friends and loved ones, please direct your comments to Senator Hillary
Clinton. Her village can raise your children while you're gone, and
she can watch over all your money and your furnishings until you
return.
"Bon Voyage!"
Is this a great country or what?
--
/\/\
(CR) Collins Richey
\/\/ "I hear you're single again." "Spouse 2.0 had fewer bugs than
Spouse 1.0, but the maintenance ... was too much for my OS."
- Glitch (tm)
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