>Dear Sir > > I am a mature student, currently studying a course on European >Trade and Business(H.N.D.) at Central College Of Commerce, Glasgow, and >as part of my actively involved in the exporting of goods and/or >services. Dear Mr. Mitchel, We at Glasgow Haskell Bugs, Gmbh. are always looking for bright, mature, new people like yourself to help us in the fight against the insidious bugs which lurk in the Glasgow Haskell Compiler. As your thorough investigation of our organization has undoubtedly revealed, GHB, Gmbh. (or 'Guh-hubby-Gum-buh', as we insiders call it) is a technological company on the very edge of state-of-the-art bug eradication. In the modern world, computers and technical knowledge are easy to come by, and yet we have found it unusually difficult to recruit young people who possess the necessary drive, experience and expertise to use even the simplest technology in a responsible and sensible fashion. Thus, we were delighted to discover your well-stated and thoughtful letter had unerringly found its way into our electronic mailbox. > I have identified your company as being both suitable an >relevant to my requirements, and I am writing to you , therefore, to ask >if you would consider an application from me for a work placement, >ideally of 10 days duration, with your orgnisation. Both your spelling and your assessment of our organization are remarkably accurate. Your skills would be a perfect complement to our existing resources, and so I am happy to be able to say that we will extend to you an offer for work placement, not just for a mere 10 days, but for an indefinite period. As a famous man once said, "Kid, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship." > I have to prepare and submit a report which deals with any major >aspect of exporting today, and I am particularly interested in the >Channels Of Distribution which a company chooses to employ , and the >reasons for their choice. I would, however, be grateful for the >opportunity to work within any subject area of exporting to-day. As a >mature student, I have had substantial experience of the 'real work' >situation and i feel that I could make a useful contribution to your >company. This is truly incredible. Just as we had perfected our new debugging method, called 'bug exportation,' a man with your abilities comes to us. My God, how could you have known? Using bug exportation, we have found a kinder and more humane way of eliminating bugs from GHC: instead of deleting, squashing or obliterating them, we simply convince them to leave and infiltrate other programs, usually previous releases of GHC. We believe that this is actually the underlying principle of debugging because our tests indicate that previous releases are in fact consistently more buggy than the latest release. Mr. Quackfoot, who will be occupying the cubicle next to yours for the duration of your stay with us, is writing up a paper on this very subject. He will be more than happy to discuss with you the details of the method, the Channels of Distribution, And The Reason Our Company Chooses To Employ This Particular Method. As you know debugging is a difficult task, and like many of our employees, there was a period where Mr. Quackfoot cracked under the pressure---he became a so-called burnout, as it is known is some circles. But, it is with great pride that we regard him today. With the advent of his new theory on debugging via bug exportation, his recovery seems to be complete and we look forward to many great new ideas emerging from your partnership with him, and the proximity of two such great minds. > I hope you will give my application you serious attention and >that you can be of assistance to me in my exporting project. I hope to >hear from you soon. No, it is us who will be hoping to hear soon from you! Farewell, Mr. Mitchel, and we hope to be seeing you in our offices soon. Yours truly, Frank A, Christoph President and CEO Glasgow Haskell Bugs, Gmbh.
