Tongue in Cheek By Cecil Pinto (June 2005 - Goa Today magazine)
Till a few years back the term "take-away" for me was only used in the context of restaurants that provided 'parcel' service. But since then I have been exposed to, and educated about, the controversial other type - Wedding Take-Aways. Nine years back when I got married we did not have take-aways at our wedding reception. But then we didn't even have tables for the guests, just regular plastic moulded chairs. And in fact if it wasn't for the last minute rescue by a generous relative we would have had 'service' dinner instead of 'buffet' dinner. But that's another story for another day.
Anyhow, even in that era I had heard about some rich people's weddings where they would give a memento of the wedding to every guest family. This usually was some dainty decorative item, with the couple's names and the date printed, made by the local decorator (or family members) out of the standard decor material of that time - the ubiquitous Thermacol. This material, referred to elsewhere in the civilized world as Styrofoam, lent itself easily to being carved into different shapes and was also plentifully and cheaply available. Decorators outdid themselves in carving decorative items from thermacol. From stiff looking two dimensional couples to realistic looking doves, candles and entwined rings. Which reminds me...The centre-piece for my wedding reception was supposed to be a basket of fresh flowers. My decorator tried hard to convince me that he would make a worthy creation of a basket and flowers and ribbons - all out of thermacol! When I told him I preferred an actual basket weaved from bamboo, fresh cut flowers and real ribbons he nearly had a heart attack. What would he do if everyone started using the actual stuff instead of getting a replica made from thermacol? Can a real item ever match the wonder of thermacol? But I digress. We shall examine centre-pieces in details some other day.
Where was I? Take-aways. These have now become the standard item at Goan Catholic weddings and families compete to outdo each other in the uniqueness of their take-aways. I don't get invited to many weddings but I have seen people's hall-showcases stuffed with take-aways that range from the simply hideous to the exquisitely exotic - and hence expensive. At the few weddings I have attended to in the last few years my usual late appearance means that we used to miss out on the take-away that was normally kept on every table. I hear there were families then, where the entire brood of children were trained in the art of surreptitious take-away-swiping from other guests' tables. Of late though I have noticed that the take-aways are not kept on the table but instead distributed somewhere towards the end of the reception by close family members, who give you the take-away with the air of having given you a rare and privileged honour. Some weddings even have separate take-aways from the bride's and the groom's families. The take-away-swiping families of old have now taken to the subterfuge of trying to ingratiate themselves with both families, in the bonhomie of the wedding, so that they can get home with more than just the one take-away that they are entitled to.
The thermacol bastion has been busted by scented candles, wood carvings, china clay items and what-have-you. Hall-showcases all over Goa are stuffed to overflowing with take-aways, which maybe isn't such a bad thing after all compared to the minature alcohol bottles, scent cans, unused lighters and entire cheap melamine dinner sets that used to earlier dominate these showcases.
Which is a good time as ever to examine the other take-aways that have led to more marital and family strife than the previous category - Children's Party Take-Aways. Aaaaaahhhh! Time was when you brought a packet of Rasna, a kilo of sugar, a few dozen samosas, patties... and with a simple cassette player and a bit of imagination could have a fantastic Kiddies' Party for your child's birthday. No longer. From the guest list to the music to the catering (the frigging D'Costas have come back from the USA as pure vegetarians) to the soft drinks (who cares if colas contains pesticides - if my kids can have them theirs can too!) to the entertainment (the Kamats had a magician and a DJ), it has become a parents nightmare keeping up with the Rebellos.
"So what if they had actual school bags stuffed with imported chocolates as take-aways for Rohan's birthday. Rohan's father is a builder, and a politician. And at Sarita's party they gave away imported Lego toy kits? So what? You want me to sell a kidney to fund the take-aways? Just give the standard pencil box with a few knickknacks like at Benny's son's lovely homely party last year. Nobody invites Benny's son for parties any more? And they've stopped inviting Benny and his kids for weddings too? Good! Maybe this take-away thing is taking away our sanity from us."
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