Dating apps are villans ?

The brutal killing  of Shradha has brought dating apps into sharp
focus.People are demanding  ban or strict regulations to avoid a
repeat.What about marriage bereaus   or adds in newspapers?
Do they assure success?  The decisions are made by mature and consenting
adults.There are aspects of life, personality which may never be  fully
disclosed even in  love and arranged marriages.Have there not been such
ghastly incidents in  legal marriages?There are happy and broken relations
in anytype of  normal marriages.Parents are not enemies wishing anything
catastrophic for their children .Their advice, experience ,suggestions are
well meaning  for our welfare and they have been part and parcel of our
life so long.Rushing into relationship without  their consent  may not be
exactly   a wise decision .The success ratio , comparison between dating
apps ,marriage bereaus ,adds  arranged or love marriages  may not be
eskewed. The success in relations depends upon adjustment mutual respect
and  common goals  that need maturity and selflessness
The focus is on Shradha as she is the victim who has lost her precious
life in most gruesome manner. Why did she not confide  in her parents
rather than  trying to reform a drug addict, abusive partner without proper
job or financial  stability  Inter caste and inter religious  relations
whether temporary or permanent have peculiar adjustment problems .The
quarrels over  expense on  groceries is phatetic to start with  .Without a
steady job he was living off her income and she should have realised it
.Why did she endure physical abuse in live in relationship.?Never
complained to authorities about domestic violence.?The friends  in whom she
confided  did not come to her rescue or consider serious enough  to
Live in relations trends are  apparently normal and must be regulated.They
must be registered just like a marriage.The legal rights  to properties be
assured.The children born or adopted  in such a relation must be be
considered as legitimate, sharing rightly all the inheritances. Disputes
and conflicts settlement must be on the same lines as legally married
couples with  recourse to divorce or separation.It need to be considered as
a form of marriage
Why had she to bear  extreme physical and mental abuse and continue to live
in relations ?She was mature enough to  walkout  anytime and specially
under circumstances but she persisted in a hopeless situation too long with
nothing to look forward too. Legitimacy for lesbians and homosexuals   live
in relations is another issue.The western concept of live in relationshipl
without biological  issue, responsibility , commitment is catching up here
too.The society too seem to accept this aberration as necessary evil .The
selfishness in live in  relations will destroy  the institution of marriage
and  basic family unit of the society.Surrogacy and adoption make tradition
and formalities redundant
Nelson Lopes Chinchinim

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