Cheers Dears
By Augusto Pinto
The Olympics at M.A.D.
Dears,
The regulars were seated at the card table of the Moira Association of
Desperadoes [M.A.D.]. As they picked and flicked their cards out, the topic
of conversation was the Olympics. Elroy the Birdbrain said,"Why is it that
our country, of 1000 million souls, does so miserably at the Games?"
Dadi replied,"Arre zod'dia, at least be thankful that the Bindra boy won a
gold medal." Added Farrack "And that wrestler Sushil Kumar and that boxer
Vijender Kumar were also good enough to get a couple of medals too. Usually
if we get one single bronze, it's a great thing"
Elroy retorted, "But look at China's gold haul. How can they do it and not
we?" Dadi said,"It's the infrastructure yaar. Do you know the sort of
facilities that are required to produce top quality sports sons? Where do we
have such facilities?""And where are the coaches?" added Farrack.
Dr. Romulus de Souza Nazare, President of M.A.D. happened to be passing by.
Overhearing the conversation, he gave his two pice worth of wisdom in his
oratorical style, "Indians have no Discipline. How can you excel at sports
without Discipline? This country needs a Dictatorship, like China. Only then
will there be any Progress. People must be told what to do and they must do
it. Like in China." And he went his way.
Farrack said,"That pompous Fatface should discipline his own son. The way
he's been driving the new car that Fatface has bought him, he will kill
somebody soon. " Dadi said,"Arre, Fatface wants to get him into Formula 1
car racing, not into the Olympics."
Elroy, "Look, come back to the subject. If infrastructure is that big an
issue, how is it that countries like Kenya and Ethiopia where people live in
even more difficult conditions than us. do so well? Jagadamba, who had once
worked in Kenya said,"The weather there is very good for athletics."
Dhananjay who was a pucca Nationalist replied,"What sort of climatic
conditions are not available in our Bharat Mahaan? What you talk is
nonsense!"
Joao said,"The problem is with our diet. Can our people do anything great
after eating these dal and sabji meals ?" Joao, had been a chef in the
Gulf and was a great believer in the efficacy of the proteins in meat for
supplying energy." Dhananjay snorted furiously,"What nonsense! Ask any
doctor. Vegetarian meals are the healthiest!!" "Grass is for cows!!" -
shouted Joao back. Dhananjay lost his cool. "I'm not going to listen any
more to this tripe!!". Throwing his cards down on the table, he stormed out
of the club.
After the furore died down, Farrack said,"The problem lies with our
administrators. Dadi said,"You have a point there. Thanks to them we did not
even qualify in our National sport" Elroy said,"I didn't know they have
cricket in the Olympics." Dadi said,"Arre zod'dia, hockey is our National
game, not cricket." Not for nothing is Elroy called Birdbrain, although in
this case one could understand his confusion.
For once Farrack was sympathetic to Birdbrain. "Yes Elroy, it's that giant
banyan tree called cricket overshadowing every other game that does not
allow any other game to flourish." However, Elroy who didn't like to be
patronized by any one retorted,"I doubt that. Does not Australia do well in
cricket, and hockey and swimming and so many other sports?"
Fatface was passing back again at this moment. "I think it is time to stop
moaning about the past, and to chalk out a Concrete Plan of Action. M.A.D.
must get children to actively pursue sports. Then only will they have
healthy minds in healthy bodies."
Just then lovely Sanjeeta, stepped into the club. Said Farrack,"Hey Sanju ,
Dr. Romulus is planning to get M.A.D. to develop sports stars in Moira. Will
you get your kids to join his program?" "Bah!!", replied Sanjeeta, "And
will those sports feed my kids when they grow up?"
No one had an answer.
Till next time then...
Cheers (ENDS)
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The above article appeared in the August 27, 2008 edition of the Herald, Goa
