Cheers Dears
By Augusto Pinto

Aunty Ponty


Dears,

It was hot and humid when I took my dog Laskar out for a morning walk. With 
summer 
setting in early this year, Laskar's bounding strides quickly tired me out. 
When we 
reached Aunty Ponty's Bar I felt like having a soda.

Actually, the joint has some other nondescript name but everyone calls it Aunty 
Ponty's after its owner Priscillina Pontes. Aunty Ponty opens her bar as early 
as 
6.30 a.m. to provide an uttaro to the alcoholics who line up outside waiting 
for 
her. [Uttaro is the first dose that chronic alcoholics require to start the day 
after their fitful booze-induced sleep.]

As I entered, one of the early morning drinkers came up to Aunty Ponty and 
said, 
pro-offering his glass, "Aunty - one for the road." Aunty snapped at him," Jose 
Piedade Lawrence! You will not get one for the road, one for the gutter or one 
for 
the grave. You have a wife and 3 children. You need to work. Off with you - and 
once 
you've given your day's wages to your wife, we'll see." Sheepishly JPL 
said,"Yes 
Aunty." and went his way.

Looking at me Aunty Ponty said,"Hello Gusto. How's Laskar?" Laskar wagged his 
tail 
in reply. Ordering my soda, I said,"How's business Priscillina?" She 
replied,"Gusto, 
demand here is inelastic. No global recession can affect us." As you might 
guess 
from this brief remark, Aunty Ponty is not your run of the mill barwalli. She 
has 
Post Graduate Degrees in Economics and Psychology, and takes a keen interest in 
issues related to education. I asked her,"Do you enjoy your job here? You could 
have 
become a lecturer, isn't it?"

"Gusto why should I join that pathetic profession? I used to teach, and after I 
got 
married my mother-in-law asked me whether I'd like to continue. I firmly 
refused and 
opted to take over the bar. Here, I am the counsellor of many who really need 
it. I 
offer more moral and spiritual education than those lackeys we call teachers in 
some 
of the cesspools we call colleges."

"What Priscillina!! This is Goa, not some Bimaru state where kidnappings or 
rapes 
are rife and where a Prof. Sabharwal can be beaten to death." Aunty Ponty let 
out a 
hollow laugh."Nonsense! You have no clue as to what happens in our 'Halls of 
Learning', Gusto."

"Like all of Goan society, our colleges too have a seedy underbelly. Believe it 
or 
not, there is ragging, MMS blackmail, sex, booze and drugs to be had, and 
violence 
is never far from the surface. Politics is rife. The staff are jokers - not 
just the 
peons and clerks and not just the temporary teachers, many of whom are paid a 
pittance and from whom one cannot expect much given their insecurity. But even 
the 
permanent staff care for nothing except their salary. Visit any college staff 
room 
and listen - the talk is only about the Sixth Pay Commission scales."

I said,"Don't the teachers understand that this will lead to disaster?" "You 
know 
Gusto, the novelist Upton Sinclaire once wrote that it is difficult to get 
someone 
to understand something when his salary depends upon his not understanding it. 
The 
other day Principal Deshmukh of the Dumbo College of Magic came here for a 
drink. He 
mentioned that a teacher from his college was brutally beaten up. I asked him 
why 
and he replied that the teacher had found a boy misbehaving. When the student 
was 
pulled up, he caught the teacher by the throat and slapped and punched him 
around."

"So what action did Principal Deshmukh take?" Aunty Ponty said,"Action? What 
action 
can a coward like that take? He was selected for his post precisely because he 
is 
spineless and will crawl even before he is asked to bend by his masters. To 
call 
such a person a dog would be an insult to Laskar here."

Aunty Ponty continued, "However I did ask Deshmukh your question. He replied 
that he 
had no intention of interfering as the boy might have political influence. He 
was 
going to appoint an inquiry committee and by the time they come up with a 
report, if 
they do come up with a report that is, he would have retired and gone back to 
Maharashtra."

I had finished my soda and Aunty Ponty gave Laskar a sweet, so we strolled back 
home. I thought that Aunty Ponty was wise to become an honest respectable 
barwalli 
rather than a disreputable lecturer. Unlike some.

Till next time then...

Cheers   (ENDS)

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The above article appeared in the March 11, 2009 edition of the Herald, Goa 


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