On 2009/11/22 Vivian A. DSouza <[email protected]<http://in.mc940.mail.yahoo.com/mc/[email protected]> >: > I too was called Uncle when I came to live in Goa > by everyone, including youngsters. Being a > grandfather many times over, I respectfully asked > them to call me "Xapai"....
Those who were bred on British ways are particularly apt to feel offended when Goans who are younger address them as 'Aunty' and 'Uncle' In my village there was a man called 'Mingu', who although dead, his full name I will not reveal, as I have enough enemies as it is and I don't want his descendants to come down on my head threatening me with lawsuits a la Senhor Dias. Well, a long time ago, a time when when we were still in half pants, a friend of mine named Janja and I landed up at his door with a subscription for some worthy cause. We said something like, "UNCLE, please donate something........." Even before the sentence was over he snarlingly roared at us."Am I your Uncle on your Father's side or your Mother's side!!!??? You bloody @#$%^&...!!!" We didn't wait to hear any more and ran as fast our legs could take us. At that time we had no clue as to why this British fed if not bred pompous idiot felt so offended by our respectful way of addressing him. Uncle after all is only a translation of 'Mam' or 'Titiu' which is but the natural way of addressing an elder in Goa. I understood why, when my own brother came to settle in Goa after many years of service in the British army. He too was similarly cantankerous when kids called him, in all innocence and respect, 'Uncle'. He insisted that they either call him Tony or if they wanted to be formal - Mr. Pinto. Apparently in the British army the correct modes of address, for say Captain John Smith, are as follows: formal - Capt. Smith; informal and usually preferred unless the fellow wanted to pull rank - John. It seems that calling the person Smith without the honorific 'Mister' or title 'Captain' was considered derogatory. This is quite the contrary in Goa where no one would object to be called Smith by an equal while children would be expected to call him Uncle. And calling him John would definitely be regarded as disrespectful by children; and they calling him 'Mr. Pinto' would have sounded quite pretentious. In Goa people should do as the Goans do - what say you? FN wrote --- 'Now, I'm waiting for someone to agree with me that the "Goanese" controversy is simply a mix of misunderstanding on the outside, and over-sensitivity on the inside (among us, 'Goanese'!)' Well you're right in some ways and wrong in others. When someone who does not know the conventions, without reflecting calls Goenkars 'Goanese' on the analogy that the people of China are 'Chinese' then I guess you are right. Recently a woman of Goan origin wrote a cookbook where she referred to us as Goanese. Obviously she couldn't have wished to be deliberately offensive to her fellow Goenkars. However the controversy must have started (it's my surmise here) when someone wanted to put the Goenkars down. He may have termed them 'Goanese' deliberately to liken them to the Chinese who perhaps not too long ago were regarded with contempt by foriegners. Someone may have objected saying that we should be called Goans just as the people of America were called Americans. After all this guesswork, I am beginning to believe that what I say is right. Surely there must be some literature on the origins of the Goans v/s Goanese controversy. A casual google reveals among other things the uninformative: http://www.thefreedictionary.com/Goanese And also instead of a reasoned reply there is a rather enraged and emotional response from one Colaco: http://www.colaco.net/1/GoaNiz.htm I wonder if anyone has more some authoritative information on this subject. Also here's a thought: just suppose that the Chinese overtake America in economic and military might and America became like what Moira once was - a Banana Republic - would it be okay if we started calling ourselves Goanese rather than Goans? Cheers Augusto -- Augusto Pinto 40, Novo Portugal, Moira, Bardez, Goa, India E [email protected] or [email protected] P 0832-2470336 M 9881126350 Some people are like gravity. Every time you hit a high, they drag you kicking and screaming, back to earth. Most unpleasant.
