#yiv512053597 #yiv1750947804 #yiv1518157650 #yiv1102791636 v\:* {
}
#yiv512053597 #yiv1750947804 #yiv1518157650 #yiv1102791636 v\:* {
}
CYBERSMILES...
My new credit card arrived in the mail with a large sticker on it, giving the
phone number to activate the card.
I called the number and got one option:
'Press One' to activate the credit card.
That led me to a live person, who answered with her first name and the title
"Credit Card Activator."
As I got ready to give her the necessary information, she interrupted me,
asking,
"How can I help you?"
When my printer's type began to grow faint, I called a local repair shop, where
a friendly man informed me that the printer probably needed only to be cleaned.
Because, the store charged $50 for such cleanings, he told me, I might be
better off reading the printers' manual and trying the job myself.
Pleasantly surprised by his candour, I asked,
"Does your boss know that you discourage business?"
"Actually it's my boss's idea," the employee replied sheepishly.
"We usually make more money on repairs, if we let people try to fix things
themselves first."
Whenever my family leaves the house, our Shetland sheep-dog's' animal instincts
start to kick in.
He runs circles around us and nips at our heels to keep us all together.
Watching this display, my friend couldn't resist:
"You always herd the ones you love."
My son arrived back in the United States after fighting with the First Marine
Division in Iraq.
But, I still couldn't help reacting like a Mom when I saw him on the base
running over to some buddies to return a bayonet.
"Kevin!" I shouted halfway across the base, before I could stop myself. "Don't
run with that knife in your hands!"
The time came for annual immunizations at our overseas Air Force base.
To get us all vaccinated as quickly as possible, they pressed the veterinary
surgeon into helping out.
I got my injection from the vet.
"Wow," I said, "you did that so gently, I hardly felt it."
"I have to be gentle," he said. "My patients can bite."
An exciting new discovery is about to take place. Mr. Bell and his assistant, a
man named Watson, have been hard at work on Bell's new invention to transmit
sound over wires.
As Mr. Watson toiled away in the room with the receiver, he suddenly hears ....
Ring, ring, ring ....
Then....
"Good evening, sir. Are you paying too much for your long distance service?"
Carlson was charged with stealing a Mercedes Benz, and after a long trial, the
jury acquitted him.
Later that day Carlson came back to the judge who had presided at the hearing.
"Your honour," he said, "I wanna get out a warrant for that dirty lawyer of
mine."
"Why?" asked the judge. "He won your acquittal. What do you want to have him
arrested for?"
"Well, your honour," replied Carlson, "I didn't have the money to pay his fee,
so he went and took that car I stole."
My cell phone quit as I tried to let my wife know that I was caught in free-way
gridlock and would be late for our anniversary dinner.
I wrote a message on my laptop asking other motorists to call her, printed it
on a portable ink-jet and taped it to my rear windshield.
When I finally arrived home, my wife gave me the longest kiss ever.
"I really think you love me," she said. "At least 70 people called and told me
so."
After moving in to our new office space, I was given the job of completing an
Occupational Health and Safety report about the building.
I discovered that the building had been built with no fire exit!
If a fire starts at the entrance, the only way out would be to smash through
the manager's office window.
So, I put these comments down and submitted my report to the manager before it
got sent to head office.
In all seriousness he added the following comment to the head office about
smashing the window,
"Please confirm that this is an acceptable option by returning your approval."
To join the group, click this link:
http://in.groups.yahoo.com/group/relatively_friendly/
If you liked this mail, please forward it to all your relatives and friends..
Get your own website and domain for just Rs.1,999/year.* Go to
http://in.business.yahoo.com/
