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Bad day at the Office
Think of this guy the next time you think you are having a bad day!
Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana.
He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs.
Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to Laughline,
who was sponsoring a "worst job experience" contest.
Needless to say, she won.
Hi Sue,
Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother.
Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you've been
feeling down lately at work, so I thought I would share my
dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all.
Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore
you with a few technicalities of my job. As you know, my office
lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office.
It's a wetsuit.
This time of year the water is quite cool.
So what we do to keep warm is this:
We have a diesel powered industrial water heater.
This $20,000 piece of shit sucks the water out of the sea.
It heats it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down
to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose.
Now this sounds like a damn good plan, and I've used it
several times with no complaints. What I do, when I get to
the bottom and start working is, I take the hose and stuff it
down the back of my wetsuit. This floods my whole suit
with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi.
Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my ass started
to itch. So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse.
Within a few seconds my ass started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my
back, but the damage was done. In agony I realized what
had happened. The hot water machine had sucked up a
jellyfish and pumped it into my suit.
Now since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't
stick to it. However, the crack of my ass was not as fortunate.
When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually
grinding the jellyfish into my ass.
I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator.
His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along
with 5 other divers, were all laughing hysterically.
Needless to say I aborted the dive.
I was instructed to make 3 agonizing in-water decompression
stops totaling 35 minutes before I could reach the surface to
begin my chamber dry decompression. When I arrived at the
surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet.
As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter
running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me
to rub it on my ass as soon as I get in the chamber.
The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't shit for 2 days
because my asshole was swollen shut.
So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much
worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your ass!
Tight lines and calm seas,
Richard.
Get an email ID as [email protected] or [email protected]. Click
here http://in.promos.yahoo.com/address
