1. Only in America... can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
2. Only in America... are there handicap parking places in front of a skating
rink.
3. Only in America... do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back
of the store to get their
prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
4. Only in America... do people order double cheese burgers, large fries, and a
diet coke.
5. Only in America... do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to
the counters.
6. Only in America... do leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway
and put our useless junk in the garage.
7. Only in America... do use answering machines to screen calls and then have
call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in
the first place.
8. Only in America... do buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages
of eight.
9. Only in America...
do use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in
Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'.
10. Only in America... do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille.
"May you live to be 100 and may the last voice you hear be Mine."
