Asmwbkth...
Sheikh..., semua manusia adalah born-muslim...
Jadi terma yang betul adalah; "raised-muslim"
Orang kafir juga born-muslim... (Hadith Nabi ALLAH, Sa.w.), tapi mereka tidak
raised / dibesarkan muslim.
Jadi tolong guna terma "raised muslim" bagi orang Melayu muslim dan yang
selonggok dengan mereka... ...
AKAD
===========================================.
[EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote:
From: "Dr. Musa bin Mohd Nordin"
Date: Mon, 17 Sep 2007 16:18:08 +0800
Subject: [NaqibNet Diskusi] thank you all
asm
....
dr. musa
on behalf of MPF
Focus
Monday September 17, 2007
Making waves
Stories by SHAHANAAZ HABIB
A convert speaks about the unreasonable pressures on new Muslims.
AUSTRALIAN Susan Carlands mother was very blunt about what she thought about
Islam. I dont care if you marry a drug dealer, but dont marry a Muslim!
she had told her 17-year-old daughter. Understandably then, when Carland
converted to Islam two years after that and she did not do it for a man!
she didnt have the guts to tell mum. Susan Carland: We
often expect brand new converts to start behaving in ways that we may have
taken years to be able to do.
I was really frightened. I didnt relish the reaction of my mother and
friends. It was agonising at that time and I was caught in a lonely place ... I
felt like a hypocrite, said Carland, one of the key speakers at a conference
on Muslim Women in the Midst of Change, held in Kuala Lumpur early this
month. It didnt take too long for fate to intervene. She came home one day
to find her mother happily cooking pork chops for the family. As nervous as she
was, Carland was forced to come clean about being a Muslim. My mum cried
when I told her and things became very tense at home, she said. She moved out
shortly after that. It has been eight years since and the rift between
mother and daughter has healed. Now, my mum even buys me head scarves and
sends presents to my children for Eid. But others have not been so
accepting. At times when the head-scarved Carland was out shopping back home in
Australia with her children, she had people hurl abuses and tell
her to go back from where you came from. But she takes such things in her
stride because she has bigger concerns on her plate. Some of her ideas are
daunting, such as urging a re-look at mosques, while others are downright
pragmatic, like telling those born Muslims to give new converts a break.
Speaking at a dinner talk during the conference, organised by the Muslim
Professionals Forum and the Women, Family and Community Development Ministry,
Carland, who was named Australian Muslim of the Year in 2004, was brutally
honest about the treatment of converts at the hands of born Muslims.
Lifting the Veil (as her talk was aptly titled), what she had to say
certainly made many cringe. Barely have the last words of the shahada
(proclamation of faith) left the lips of new converts, she said, they find
themselves bombarded with rules to adhere to. Never mind that the sister
doesnt know how to pray. She is told she must get rid of all her old clothing,
because it is too Western and thus unIslamic and put on the hijab (head scarf)
immediately. Dont worry that our new brother has only been a Muslim for
three minutes. Hes already been told that he has to throw out all his music
and get rid of his dog or hed be committing a big sin. The list of
unreasonable pressures on converts includes telling converts to leave their
so-called haram jobs immediately, even if the person had no other source of
income. The newbies are asked to give up hobbies like painting,
photography, dancing or playing instruments. Theyre advised to move out and
sever ties with their kafir (infidel) family and non-Muslim friends, while
female converts are urged to get married as soon as possible. They are often
expected to give up their own cultures and take on Arab, sub-continental, Malay
or other cultures because these are deemed to be more Islamic. Carland, a
lecturer at Monash University in Melbourne, described these demands
as not only unreasonable but also very dangerous as they made things
unnecessarily hard for the convert. We often expect brand new converts to
start behaving in ways that we may have taken years to do so. By expecting too
much of them, too soon, the beauty of the religion that attracted them can
quickly become a terrible burden that is simply too much to endure. The
complete message of Islam was revealed over 23 years. And the Prophet taught
almost nothing but tawhid (oneness of God) for the first 13. Alcohol, too, was
not banned all at once, but over three stages and several years.So why do we
expect new converts to be fully practising Muslims as soon as they convert?
Carland also takes the Muslim community to task for having an almost
schizophrenic attitude towards converts. On one hand, she pointed out,
Muslims liked converts because they made them (the Muslims) feel good about
themselves and their faith. But on the flip side, converts were often
made to feel inferior by those born Muslims A practising Muslim herself
for years, she finds it maddening whenever born Muslims ask her to recite
verses from the Quran to prove that she is really one, and knows enough to
pray. Such encounters are degrading and condescending. How would anyone
here feel if I were to ask her to recite some Quranic verses for me to prove
her Muslim-ness? Obviously it would be quite insulting. As one convert asked
me, When do I stop being seen as the convert and start being seen as a
Muslim? As for converts who feel bitter and want to leave Islam, Carland
urged Muslims to be gentle and give the person the space to work things
through. Sometimes all he or she needs is a sounding board, instead of
pressure and ridicule. If you have a convert come to you in a state of
spiritual angst, he or she may say things that are challenging, perhaps even
blasphemous, But we owe it to them to listen and just let them talk it
through.
Converts often have a challenging mind, which is one of the factors that made
them Muslims in the first place. Sometimes, having someone listen could be the
last thing that helps these people hold on, she said. Sometimes just being
able to say some things and getting them out is enough. Hopefully they will
come out the other side with their faith stronger than ever. If not, you
can stand in front of Allah on the Day of Judgment and say, I tried. I did my
best for this person. After all, it is not up to us to change their hearts.
You can only do what you can. On mosques, Carland said these institutions
were just not supportive enough of new converts. Female converts report
being shouted out, criticised and, worse, simply ignored by both other women
and men, the first time they nervously enter a mosque. Often they report
leaving in tears, she disclosed. In countries like Australia, where Muslims
are a minority, the mosque is the one place where new
female converts can feel a sense of community, belonging and support. To deny
them this haven is simply injustice and short-sightedness in the extreme.
Listening intently: Participants at the Muslim Women in the
Midst of Change held in Kuala Lumpur.
She cited an incident in which the father of her close Chinese friend in
Malaysia had gone to a mosque here to convert, but was told to leave instead.
She also questioned why mosques seem to have become quiet, silent places of
worship, where people go to pray and then leave. Thats not our tradition.
Thats not how the Prophet saw the mosque and not how His wives or companions
saw it. It is supposed to be a social place and a community centre. Why
cant we put up a basketball court in the mosque yard and try to get the young
to see it as their place? Why cant we teach Muslim kids hip hop on mosque
grounds? Right now the young feel isolated from the mosque. It is seen as
a place for middle-aged men. If we keep going on this way, we will not have
second- or third-generation Muslims. We need to re-think and reinvigorate the
mosque. Carlands unconventional ways may ruffle some feathers, but they
have won her fans among young Muslims in Australia.
Often the only interaction young people seem to have with the religion is
being told what they cannot do. Dont listen to music its haram. Dont have
a boyfriend its haram. Stop showing your hair haram, haram, haram. It
doesnt sound like a whole lot of fun when you are young and theres a whole
lot of peer pressure. Youve got to show the young people that Islam is
something they can be proud of. And that fun can be halal. Once, after
asking young Muslims what they would like, she followed through by getting male
and female dance teachers and organising separate classes for boys and girls.
She even got a bunch of Arab comedians to show up and tell a whole lot of halal
(clean) jokes This proved to be a hit with the young Muslims. You dont
have to just sit in your room and recite the Quran and that is the sole
existence of your life. You can still come out and have a good time, within a
certain framework. There are certainly some among the
Muslim community who do not approve of what she does. But for Carland, it is
worth it to reach a bit further and engage disenfranchised Muslims, some of
whom have never set foot in the mosque. As for the lot of women, she told
how gossip was often used, successfully, to control them. She noted how
Muslims (men included) tended to talk of great Muslim women like Khadijah and
Aishah, the wives of the Prophet, and yet not allow the women of today to walk
the talk. Women should get out there. Use the wives and female companions
of the Prophet as evidence that we can do these things. Sometimes youve just
got to make waves. Someone has to go out on a limb, and thats when things
change. Women have an amazing capacity to change society much more than
men. So just do it, she said. Carland has undoubtedly gone out on a limb to
make change. Even if she has not made waves, she has certainly made ripples.
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