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PAS : KE ARAH PEMERINTAHAN ISLAM YANG ADIL
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Assalamualaikum all
Are you y2k ready ? I am trying to be prepared and I
would like to share a story..
I went to Walmart (the biggest retail store in the
galaxy ) and bought the followings:
--propane heater that can be converted into a cooker
for coooking la..
--long life candles (12 hrs lit percandle) Why not
make 24 hr candle just like Seven Eleven.? Lit up 24
hrs.
--more batteries of all sizes for all kind of
flash/torch lights
--long life light stick....just like flares but non
flammable and water/wind proof. The package cover said
"can be used while scuba diving " ( ? ) We will see
how this thing do in the snow flurry first then we can
talk about scuba diving in nearby lake at 10 degree
Farenheit.
--fuel tank ( plastic container)yes you guess it right
for more petrol.
--gallons and gallons of water and more drinking water
--almost 50 pound of propane fuel for heater and
cooker
stove, hopefully I will not blow up my own house.
Anyway I can convert it into some kind of molotov
cocktail and blow up the neigbors just in case they
wanted to steal my air sarbat.
and
I almost buy a .22 caliber bb pistol ( competition
style as opposed to Magnum in Dirty Harry) but changed
my mind at the very last moment before I reached the
check out lane/cashier. I am afraid that I might shoot
somebody or my own foot or my pc or my Dang Bini.
Ayoyo I am too young to be a duda ( widower ) Sakit
tau ka kena tembak dengan bb bullet Its painful to be
shot by bb gun eventhough it is not real bullet(Travel
velocity 460 feet per second ). Anyway I am sure all
the netters do not want me to end up in red neck
Sheriff's county jail for shooting up the
neighborhood.
Furthermore I do not want to be Bubba's lover in no
damn jail house. I saw that on tv once.
Actually I should just bought real hand gun, join gun
safety class and NRA ( National Rifle Association )and
be a cowboy.But since I have a Muslim name and I look
like Taleban, (okay half baked Taleban since my beard
is only few milimeters long) I do not think the FBI
and the State Police will approve my hand gun permit's
application. May be I should change my name to Adamo
Mohematolovov, that sounded like Russian a little bit,
hopefully that will pass FBI back ground security
check.
I also dropped by at my favorite Oriental store and
stocked up. Yes I bought sardines, canned ikan bilis,
maggie mee and more belacan. Hey who knows, the
shipping container may get stuck in Panama channel
somewhere and I need my belacan supply. This is the
first time I noticed that there is actually instant
mee goreng. Hmmm must be nice those Indomie. How come
there is no instant Penang Mamak Mee Goreng or Char
Kuey Tiaw? Our people do not know how to manufacture
instant mee goreng ka ? I also bought few more bags of
basmati rice..actually enough to cook for iftar at the
masjid for the entire week. I think I should donate to
the masjid if I survive this y2k thang.
I really do not know why I bought all those stuff but
it's done deal. So come Jan 1, 1900 I am ready with
propane heat and cooker, lilin, beras and ikang sardin
and not to mention belacan and Melaka cabai. Any
intruders into my property will be beaten too death
with billiard stick..sorry no shot gun and Uzi in this
house. I think I should run to K-Mart and buy baseball
bat. Worse of I can actually learn how to play
baseball in the park.
I also filled up gas/petrol in all the cars and
withdrew some cash from the bank. My banks and phone
companies said that they are y2k compliance but we
will see. I really do not trust these banks, what if
the central bank collapse and the domino effect can
cause other banks to close down. Worst case scenario,
the banks alarm system at the door may not work and
nobody can open the bank's front door for the day's
business without the crow bar and torch.
I wonder whether those ATM card/machine will really
work. I hear all kind of horror story about missing
money from ATM machines back home. If I cannot trust
the bank run by Muslims back home how can I trust
these non Muslims bank. Some how our PM, Dr M always
mentioned that the foreign bankers conspired to
destroy our economy. Hopefully those machine will
not only telan (swallow) my money but also all my
debts and credit cards outstanding balance. That would
be nice isn't it.
If you do not hear from me on Jan 1, 00 or if I do not
hear from any of you, we must mutually assume that y2k
ghost has actually eaten all of us...and that is not a
satire any more.
Adam Mohamad
Jan 29 1899
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