Professor,where have you been?? Glad to see you're back..or your front,for that matter. ----- Original Message ----- From: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> To: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> Sent: Sunday, October 26, 2003 11:44 AM Subject: [Hornlist] You, Your Musics, Your Audiences and Your Monies
> Clayton Whetmore, there, wrote: > I'm curious...can you play the piano with such ease as Dino > Kartsonakis? Can you play the sax as well as Kenny G? Have you, like > Michael Bolton, sold over 52 million albums and singles worldwide, and > won two Grammys and six American Music Awards among many other accolades. > > <shrugging> I suppose it's easy to look down our noses, from high atop > ivory towers, at these supposedly poor specimens of musicians <tongue in > cheek>. But, if one is honest with oneself, one must admit that they've > accomplished something most of us have not! > > Now, I am finally agreeing again at long last with someone on this mostly > sophomoric of lists (of course if this list is sophomoric that Yahoo list is > freshmanic or sophomoronic at best) because Clayton has with the mostest of > correctiles pointed out that, yes, no one on this list can play the piano like Dino, > or the Sax like Kenny G. and no one, I mean, no one on this list is ever > going to sell 52 million albums and singles (but I know that Prof. H.P. has sold > 52 albums and I don't know about singles, but he use to consume in his party > days 52 doubles) like Michael Bolton and most of the students on this list, > judging by their mostestest egotisticals of writings to us from their safe ivory > towers at their universities think that if they make the practicings of > concertos and the rehearsals or symphonies and wind ensembles and the sloppings > through of their excerpts with their bad rhythms, wrong notes, sloppy dynamics, > out of tunes and ass-tone sounds that someday they may play the horn as well as > Kenny B. or even the right-handed E flat Wagner Tube as well as moi and make > some kind of living at it performing in public and/or teaching others how to > play when in reallity they can't even play KOPPRASCH NUMBER ONE with a good > sound, correct rhythm, secure and in tune notes and proper, musical dynamics!!! > > Caveat Feces! > > Mostest of Musics and Monies for All of You, > > Prof. I. M. Gestopftmitscheist > Principal 8th horn and Principal 4th Wagner Tuber, Schplittenotendorf am > Oedland Staatsoper und Philharmoniker, (ret.) > Solo Horn, Exit 2 Brass Quintet > Hornist, Broken Winds WW Quintet > Solo 4th Horn (Leader, call me for bookings), Smirnoff Horn Quartet > Hornist as Needed, L'Ensemble du Chambre des Palourdes > Principal Natural Horn, I Soloisti di Feces > Principal Baroque and Hunting Horn, Camarata Vongoleforte > Adjunct, Part-time, Arms-length Professor of Horn and Pest Control, Exit 2 > Community College, Exit 2, NJ > Author, "The Kopprasch Connection," "Kopprasch for Fun and Profit," > "Kopprasch for the New Millenium: Where Do you Fit In?" and "Hooked on Hornonics" > Founder, Director and CEO, Universal Institute for the Study, Preservation > and Dissemination of Kopprasch Throughout the Solar System > Founder and Guru Extraordinaire, Hornaholics Anonymous > Grand Poobah of the Koppraschian Kult > Director and Program Manager, The All Kopprasch Channel (AKC), Kopprasch > Public Radio (KPR) > Host of "The Kopprasch Factor" on AKC and "All Kopprasch Considered" on KPR > Founder of Kopprasch Depot, your one stop shop for all you need! > Interplanetarily Known Soloist and Artist of Record > Phone: yes > Fax: yes > E-mail: yes > Website: no > > "Kopprasch in, money out!" > _______________________________________________ > post: [EMAIL PROTECTED] > set your options at http://music.memphis.edu/mailman/options/horn/amegenity%40comcast.net _______________________________________________ post: [EMAIL PROTECTED] set your options at http://music.memphis.edu/mailman/options/horn/archive%40jab.org
