1. A man and woman are lying side bay side after making love.
Woman: "Why don't we get married, honey?" Man: "Who'd marry us?"
2. A husband and a wife have a tiff, and the wife refuses to cuddle
at bedtime, so the husband reads a book while she turns over to sleep.
Suddenly she wakes up feeling him put a finger I her vagina, and whirls
to face him, half in anger and half willing to be reconciled. "Oh,
don't worry," he says, "I was only going to wet my finger to turn the
page."
3. A married woman who was too busy to answer the door when a
neighbour knocks explains later: "The baby was suckin', the old man was
fuckin' and I was readin' a book."
4. A man comes home to find his wife admiring herself naked in the
mirror. "Do you know what the doctor told me today?" she asks. "He said
I had the most perfectly formed woman's body he's ever seen." " Did he
say anything about that big fat ass of yours?" "No, your name didn't
even come up."
5. A man persistently refuses a theatrical agent's offer of tickets
to all the finest concerts on the ground that "Schlivovitz" is playing
tonight." Finally the agent loses his temper and asks, "Say, what
instrument does this "Schlivovitz" play I never even heard of him."
"No, and you never will. He plays second saxophone in a four-piece band
in a beer-joint in Newark." "So"? "So when he plays - I fuck his wife."
THE END
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