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Article Title: Family Money Management  - Advice on Borrowing and Lending 
Within Families
Author: Beverly OMalley
Category: Parenting, Personal Finance
Word Count: 778
Keywords: family money management,money management advice
Author's Email Address: [email protected]
Article Source: http://www.articlemarketer.com
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Articles on family money management advice usually dispense information about 
spending, saving, and investing. But there is another part of money management 
in families that is important and that is lending and borrowing.

If you have ever loaned money to a family member and they failed to paid you 
back, you are undoubtedly familiar with the damage to personal relationships 
that can result from borrowing and lending of money between family members.

It is only natural that family members might want to help each other out by 
lending money if they are able. After all one of the functions of a family is 
to share resources. The complicating factor with money lending is that there 
are emotional relationships involved that can be affected by the emotional 
tensions created by the loan.

Sometimes the tension over defaulted loans is so great that family 
relationships are permanently damaged.

A finance company or a bank has no hesitation in going after the collateral for 
their money when someone has defaulted on a loan, but then they really do not 
want to ever see that person again. The same cannot be said for your family. 
Are you really prepared to repossess your son's electric guitar if he defaults 
on your loan?  what about repossessing your adult child's house if they default 
on the mortgage payment?

Here is some family money management advice to help you avoid emotional baggage 
that can result from lending money within the family structure.

   1. never loan money that you really need (or want) - in other words if you 
loan money to a family member you must be prepared to see that money disappear, 
forever, so that you can continue your relationship with that person. If you 
are not prepared to lose the money do not lend it. This has to be the prime 
directive  for money management advice within families.

   2. assess risk - it doesn't matter who the family member is who wants the 
loan, you must assess the risk. Why would you lend money to a person who has 
already been turned down by a bank? Does it make sense to loan money to a 
parent or an adult child who has no way to pay you back, or has a history of 
poor money management? Every borrower will promise to pay you back. They have 
to tell you that. If they said, "Oh and by the way, I do not intend to pay the 
money back." they know you will not come through with the loan.

   3. never co-sign a loan - when you co-sign a loan you are taking on the 
financial risk but you do not have the financial asset of the collateral. In 
case of default on the loan the lending institution will come after you for 
that loan and you will be liable for the balance. That is what a co-signing 
responsibility is. It is extremely risky to have a financial liability with no 
collateral to show for having borrowed the money. When you cosign a loan so you 
child can be a car you have the liability for the loan but the child owns the 
car. You have nothing except the liability of the loan if your adult child 
defaults.

   4. give your adult children money - give freely and regularly for birthdays 
and gift giving holidays. Give what you can afford but give freely and without 
conditions. This is a gift not a loan. If you have to say no to a loan request 
you cannot be accused of being cheap or tight with your money if you give 
freely. You have the right to say no when asked for a loan and you have no 
obligation, duty, or responsibility to lend money to your adult children or any 
family member.

   5. formalize all loans with notarized statements - Let's say your spouse has 
convinced you to help out your brother-in-law. If you can afford it, and if you 
think he has the ability and the desire to pay you back and if you are prepared 
to never see that money again go for it, but formalize it with a notary public 
(at your brother- in-law's cost). The process of notarizing formalizes the 
arrangement, spells out the terms of the loan as well as the consequences of 
default. Remember however, that the ultimate consequence is still the same so 
please be prepared to never see that money again (See family management advice 
rule number 1.

These 5 rules for family money management will help you to control your own 
money and reduce the opportunity for money to destroy your family relationships.

Beverly Hansen OMalley is a nurse who is fascinated by the various influences 
on organizing behaviour and the influence of an organized environment on human 
health and well being.  She explores these influences at 
http://www.organization-makes-sense.com
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