I got a call that the old man who sold me most of my horses and gave
me Gallant Boy,  told someone he would really love to see me, that his
wife was in the hospital and not doing very well and he was really
broke up about it.  So I drove a hundred miles from work to the
hospital, didnt get there til around 8 PM, as soon as I walk into the
room oh my, I see things are not good at all.  She was just struggling
and laboring for every breath, completely unconscious, I was just
shocked, and he is sitting there all slumped over, holding her hand.
He was just bereft, started crying when he saw me.  I hugged him.  the
son hugged me and whispered "thank goodness you're here!  please, can
you get him out of here a little while?  he's been here all day and
won't leave the room and he's just a wreck". So I put my arm around
the old man and said come on, come with me, lets go get some coffee
and he straggles up and we walk out and I take him into the break room
and get him some coffee.

and jeez as soon as we left the room she drew her last breath!  I feel
so bad about this!  I feel like i deprived him of his last minute with
his dying wife or something!!  he seemed ok about it, i mean after the
impact and blow and all when they told him, but jeez i feel like the
angel of death or something!  The doctor comes, the preacher, the
nurses, his daughter, and there I sit and he is in just a state of
shock.  he would reach and take my hand and say :"this is janice,
she's a good friend, she has some a my horses" and I was like oh my
god what a nightmare!  then the son tells me later when I said how bad
I felt, that he felt like she had been hanging on all day and it was
like she couldn't let go with him in the room cause the instant he
walked out and the door closed she stopped breathing.  is that weird
or what?!?  i had some pics of the horses I had wanted to show her
cause she always loved seeing pics of them, and the old man folded
them and put them in his pocket...

he told me, everyone, said it several times, that he didnt want to go
on without her, that he wished he could go with her.  I told him he
needed to stick around to help us with our horses cause he knew so
much.  Gosh I didnt know what to say.

I just cant stop thinking about this today...
Janice

-- 
yipie tie yie yo

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