Title: HCore Bonus
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iklan-mini, First Come First Serve H-Core Bonus!
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Jokes of the day
Stop being late to work
Tom had this problem of getting up late in the morning and was always late for work. His boss was mad at him and threatened to fire him if he didn't do something about it. So Tom went to his doctor who gave him a pill and told him to take it before he went to bed. Tom slept well and in fact beat the alarm in the morning by almost two hours. He had a leisurely breakfast and drove cheerfully to work.
Boss, he said, The pill actually worked!
That's all fine said the boss, But where were you yesterday?
The boss tells some jokes
The boss returned from lunch in a good mood and called the whole staff in to listen to a couple of jokes he had picked up. Everybody, but one girl laughed uproariously.
What's the matter? grumbled the boss. Haven't you got a sense of humor?
I don't have to laugh, she replied. I'm leaving Friday.
How to look busy
Generally, this will not be a concern until you are promoted to an executive position. But once you've created the illusion that you serve even the slightest purpose at your place of business, there's no telling how far you'll go. In the real working world, productivity is all a matter of appearances.
Appearance: You are furiously taking notes while conducting an important telephone marketing survey.
Reality: You are pretending to take notes while talking to your friend who has called collect from Bulgaria.
Appearance: You are on the phone with a client in New York and you have said, Yes sirree! That stock is about to shoot through the roof, now's a great time to buy, I tell ya!
Reality: You are on the phone with a friend in Guam and you have said, Yeah, this job is terrible, and my boss is such a pushy whining... Yes sirree! That stock is about to shoot through the roof, now's a great time to buy, I tell ya!
Appearance: You are at your computer writing a serious business memorandum to your department supervisior.
Reality: You are at your computer telling dead-baby jokes to your e-mail correspondent in Namibia.
Appearance: You are urgently plugging numbers into a complicated spreadsheet.
Reality: You are playing Tetris.
Appearance: You are tapping away on calculator keys, helping out the accounting department.
Reality: You are paying your electric bill.
Appearance: You are reading the Unix manual.
Reality: You are reading the TV guide you placed in the Unix manual.
Appearance: You are staring at an empty computer screen, absorbed in deep thought.
Reality: You have pressed Escape just in time, erasing a MacDraw portrait entitled Supervisor with Pitchfork Wound Clinging to a Cliff
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