now ilugd doubles up as our daily joke service.
i hope this trend continues as i am having a very rough time out here.

On 3/18/08, Eric Raymond <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
> ---------- Confidential Message ----------
> From: Microsoft HR Director <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
> Date: Mar 15, 2006 11:16 AM
> Subject: Memo to Indian Staff
>
>
> MEMO TO INDIAN STAFF
>
> In view of the large number of Indians working in the USA , UK and
> many other countries with White People, it has become important for
> Human Resources Department to issue directives to their Indian staff.
>
> TO ALL HINDI-SPEAKING STAFF
>
> It has been brought to our attention by several officials visiting our
> corporate headquarters that offensive language is commonly used by our
> Hindi-speaking staff. Such behavior, in addition to violating our
> policy, is highly unprofessional and offensive to both visitors and
> colleagues.
>
> Staff will IMMEDIATELY adhere to the following rules:
>
> 1. Words like CHUTIYA, GANDU and other such expressions will not be
> used for emphasis, no matter how heated the discussion. You will not
> say CHUTIYE, AKKAL NAHI HAI KYA TEREKO when someone makes a mistake,
> or MADAR CHOD, BHENCHOD when a major mistake has been made. All forms
> derived from the verb CHOD are inappropriate in our environment.
>
> 2. No project manager, section head or administrator, under any
> circumstances, will be referred to as GADHA or CHUTIYA . Lack of
> determination will not be referred to as KAAMCHOR SAALA and neither
> will persons who lack initiative be referred to as BHOSADIKAA or
> MADARCHOD .
>
> 3. Unusual or creative ideas from your superiors are not to be
> referred to as GAND FAADU, if a person is persistent, or if a task is
> heavy to accomplish. In a similar way, do not use GAND FATI, if a
> colleague is going through a difficult situation.
>
> 4. Furthermore, you must not say BHOSADE MEIN GAYA when matters become
> complicated. When asking someone to leave you alone, you must not say
> DIMAG KI MAA BHEN MAT KAR. Do not ever substitute 'May I help you?'
> with BOL TERI GAND KAISE MARU.
>
> 5. When things get tough, an acceptable _expression such as 'We are
> going through a difficult time' should be used, rather than MAA CHUDI
> PADI HAI or GOTI MUH MEIN HAI.
>
> 6. No salary increase shall be ever referred to as KHAIRAAT BAATI JAA
> RAHI HAI KYA. Under no circumstances should you call our elderly
> corporate partners as BUDDHA KHOOSAT.
>
> 7. Last, but not least, after reading this memo, please do not say: YE
> KAGAJ GAND PONCHNE KE LAAYAK BHI NAHI HAI.
>
> We hope you will keep these directions in mind.
>
> Sincerely,
> Steve Rider
> Human Resources Director
> Microsoft Corporation
>
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