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"For Mothers Everywhere"
We are sitting at lunch when my daughter casually mentions
that she and her husband are thinking of "starting a family."
"We're taking a survey," she says, half-joking. "Do you think
I should have a baby?"
"It will change your life," I say, carefully keeping my tone
neutral. "I know," she says, "no more sleeping in on weekends,
no more spontaneous trips...."
But that is not what I meant at all. I look at my daughter, trying to
decide what to tell her. I want her to know what she will never learn
in childbirth classes. I want to tell her that the physical wounds of
child bearing will heal, but that becoming a mother will leave her with
an
emotional wound so raw that she will forever be vulnerable.
I consider warning her that she will never again read a newspaper
without asking "What if that had been MY child?" That every plane crash,
every
house fire will haunt her. That when she sees pictures of starving
children, she will wonder if anything could be worse than watching your
child die.
I regard her newly found confidence as an adult and think that no
matter how womanly she she has become, being a mother will reduce her
to the primitive level of a bear protecting her cub.
That an urgent call of "Mom!" will cause her to drop her dinner or her
best dish without a moment's hesitation.
I feel I should warn her that no matter how many years she has invested
in her career, she will be professionally derailed by motherhood. She
might arrange for childcare, but one day she will be going into an
important
business meeting and she will think of her baby's sweet smell. She will
have to use every ounce of her discipline to keep from running home,
just to make sure her baby is all right.
I want my daughter to know that everyday decisions will no longer be
routine. That a five year old boy's desire to go to the men's room
rather
than the women's at McDonald's will become a major dilemma.
However decisive she may be at work, she will second-guess herself
constantly as a mother. Looking at my attractive daughter, I want to
assure her that eventually she will shed the pounds of pregnancy, but
she will never feel the same about herself. That her life, now so
important,
will be of less value to her once she has a child. That she would give
it up
in a moment to save her offspring, but will also begin to hope for more
years - not to accomplish her own dreams, but to watch her child
accomplish
theirs.
I want her to know that a cesarean scar or shiny stretch marks will
become badges of honor.
My daughter's relationship with her husband will change, but not in the
way she thinks. I wish she could understand how much more you can love
a man who is careful to powder the baby or who never hesitates to play
with
his child. I think she should know that she will fall in love with him
again
for reasons she would now find very unromantic.
I wish my daughter could sense the bond she will feel with women
throughout history who have tried to stop war, prejudice and drunk
driving.
I hope she will understand why I can think rationally about most issues,
but become temporarily insane when I discuss the threat of nuclear war
to my children's future.
I want to describe to my daughter the exhilaration of seeing your child
learn to ride a bike.
I want to capture for her the belly laugh of a baby who is touching the
soft fur of a dog or a cat for the first time. I want her to taste the
joy that is so real, it actually hurts.
My daughter's quizzical look makes me realize that tears have formed in
my eyes. "You'll never regret it," I finally say.
Then I reach across the table, squeeze my daughter's hand and offer a
silent prayer for her, and for me, and for all of the mere mortal women
who stumble their way into this most wonderful of callings. This blessed
gift
from God that of being a Mother.
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Cute Sites O' The Day:
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The Wellness Plan
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"The greatest discovery of any generation
is that human beings can alter their lives by
altering the attitudes of their minds."
- Albert Schweitzer
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